RVB RANT (OBVI WIP)

CONTAINS (possible) SPOILERS. READ WITH CAUTION.

NOTE FROM BRIXTON!

Before I start writing, this is purely passion project. This shouldn't be taken seriously I am not the RVB master of all time. I do hope this could convince others to get into Red Vs. Blue or even old RVB fans to appreciate it more! I really have no idea what I'm doing honestly. This will probably be super long by the time I finish this bro.

1. What is Red Vs. Blue?: Red Vs. Blue is a web-series produced by Burnie Burns and a couple of his friends. Red Vs. Blue uses the style machinima and animation in later seasons. The show went from 2003-2021 ending with 19 seasons in total.

2. Red team: Red team A.K.A. Outpost N1 is a team at Blood Gulch fighting against Blue Team of Blood Gulch. The Red Team contains five members, Sarge, Grif, Simmons, Donut, and Lopez. Sarge is the leader of Red Team. He is obsessed with victory against the Blue Team. Sarge has red armor. Grif is the slacker of Red Team often found eating or sleeping. Sarge has a burning hatred for Grif often trying to kill him. Grif's armor color is orange. Simmons is a nerdy soldier on Red Team, often described as a kiss-ass. It's heavily implied Simmons lacks a father figure so he looks up to Sarge often. Simmons armor is maroon. Donut is the pride (literally) and joy of Red Team. Donut often makes random innuendos often ruining any moment. Donut's armor color is complex, it is described by others as pink but Donut says his armor is lightish-red. Lopez is the handy robot of Red Team built by Sarge. Sarge set Lopez's speech to spanish meaning no one can understand him. With no one often understanding him, he usually makes fun of them in Spanish. The Red Team is less serious than Blue Team but they're what makes the comedy of the show.

3. Blue team: 

PERSONAL SECTION

In this section, I talk about my favorite things in RVB such as ships, music, seasons, characters, etc. (this might end up being my opinions on things too but eh)

1. SHIPS: Okay okay, I'm so excited to talk about ships. Ships in RVB is what mainly got me into it so I'll talk about my OTPs from this series (not in order.)

 -CHEX: Chex is the ship that somewhat introduced me to RVB slash dude. I shipped them at first (mainly due to Blood Gulch Chronicles) because I thought their relationship and dynamic was very silly. Later on in the series, they became so, so, so much more than that. They're so important to me. Chex is one of those ships in RVB that makes me wanna cry. I'm genuinely getting so sad while typing this dude. I miss Chex so bad. </3

 -GRIMMONS: Grimmons is the OG. Grimmons is that best friend ship where they're obviously super gay. I go insane when Grimmons moments are poked out like THEEYY KNOOWW!!!! Anyways Simmons in season eight was about to cry about Grif trust me I'm Grif IRL I know so. But Grimmons is the ship that you can make a lot of silly content about. It's not to angsty but you can make it that way if you really wanna.

 -YORKALINA: "I would've told her... That I understand why she did what she did. I just wish she hadn't... I wish she could've learned to let things go. I guess I should too." - York's message to Carolina in season 10. GOOD GAAAAAAAAWD these two make me so crazy. Season 10 was my breaking point for this damn ship. I think about it so often it makes me wanna sob so bad. Their fight scene was so sad. I will explain the whole situation the best I can do SPOILERS YAAH!!! Basically, the Directors plans of Project Freelancer have become clear and York and Carolina are on two different sides of the situation. This leads to York confronting Carolina while the ship is going to shit. Carolina begins to threaten York so they begin to fight. York the whole fight seems to be refusing to fight Carolina. At the end of the fight, York floats up due to the anti-gravity and Carolina proceeds to throw a lighter up at York. The lighter Carolina threw up at York was York's lighter that she took from him because he wouldn't stop fidgeting with it. What makes this scene a million times worse, it doesn't play some crazy awesome fight song. It plays a sad song as they fight. This adds so much to the fight scene and that scene is what made me so crazy about that ship dude. After typing up this storm, I've realized most of the ships that are straight in RVB are so doomed (Chex, Yorkalina, and would the Director and Allison count??)

UPDATE LOG

 -9/16/25

 -9/21/25

 -9/22/25

 -10/8/25