Waiting for the bus [Blog-Diary]

I haven't made an entry since 2 Sundays ago. The morning after that 3 am fire drill, I got a call from my mom at around 10 AM. My dad had a heart attack- and was at the hospital. 

Everythings kinda blurry. It feels like both just yesterday and forever ago that I got the news. He remained there until this Monday, and was in the ICU until I think Friday? Either way, he was readmitted today when he passed out at a doctors appointment. He's back in the ICU. Again.

I spent last week making frequent trips home to try to take some of the pressure off of my mother. My dads a massive hoarder- so our home is a mess. I'd drive over after my classes, stay the night, remain most of the day cleaning just to drive back to the university in the evening until I'd return the next day. I didn't realize how much energy this would take out of me, but thankfully my professors are understanding.

My mother had stayed at the hospital for most of last week. There were days where she was there for 13 hours. She worked alongside the nurses to help my dad stay comfortable. She's an absolute saint. I know that man would not do the same for her.

I'll probably write a more detailed entry once I'm at my laptop. I have a lot of feelings and opinions about what's happening. Some anger boiling in my soul, a lot of grief for my mother, a lot of introspection into how I cope when a traumatic situation arises. 

I'm headed to therapy tonight anyways. I'll probably hit up a few thrift stores on the way to keep looking for a shower stool for dad. Maybe a few funny movies to watch with my roommates to take my mind away from all this bull. 

Also, the bus isn't here yet. My class starts in 14 minutes. I might be late. Uuuurgh. When I was walking from my dorm, I saw my cat looking out of the window, though. Ruby's been my rock through all of this. I didn't realize just how much having her as an emotional support animal would do for me. Her presence means so much to me. I love her.

I really hope this bus shows up soon. I don't want to be late to class when all of this is happening. I'm already a bit behind on my math lessons. I've got two lessons of notes to catch up on, on top of the homework due on Sunday. Urgh. 11:19... 

If only I didn't decide to mop and vacuum before I left the house. I literally watched the last bus leave from my window as I was saying bye to Ruby. Aaaauuuggghhh...

Bus is gonna be crowded too. Theres so many people here now  If I have to stand I swear I'm gonna fall over.