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This is something I have been meaning to say for a while. Granted people here have talked about annoying couples and acted like annoying couples, but there's a deeper underlying truth that's unbearable to many.
I'm not just being bitter
The idea of seeing a crush and believing that your crush is the one is, well, just an idea. Even worse, it's a lie that your mind fabricates. This lie is a product of your biological drive to reproduce that has been developed through human evolution and is directly chained to the reward system; that's why you constantly, infatuatedly think of your crush, and why you feel a euphoric high when you ever first become couples. Reality warps around that crush because it is in the interest of the pubertal mind to drive people towards romance. What is truly deceptive here is that you believe that you will always feel that way, you will never get mad, you will live happily ever after--but you won't.
Figure 1: A SpaceHey user's emotional swings on love
What is the real absurdity of all this is couples who try to prolong that stage of infatuation that they just run it into the ground faster. "Remember those days...?" In the image up there, I would advise against believing what that user says because they are all written on emotional delusions. The hardest hit is in the realization that your beliefs about your partner get shattered after the honeymoon stage of the relationship, hence the emotional crashout stage follows behind; we can see that emotional crashout roughly 2 1/2 weeks before this screenshot was taken, where the user overdramatizes what she will blame things on. This may just be one example, but you know the feeling of excitement and its subsequent disappointment.
Yes you did believe it 🫵
It would be convenient to just agree and look down on lovesick people because they have fallen for their own emotions, but you also fell for these emotions just the same way. You might not have went on and posted a blog about how much you love someone or how anxious you are to confess to that crush, but you have daydreamed, you have hoped--just be honest with yourself because you are human. What is important to note about this illusion of "true love" is that you should never treat someone with the expectation that you will be in love forever, because a relationship that will truly last would need more than glee and joy, but also sacrifice and suffering. Love is not compulsive nor reactionary, but it is a choice, a hard choice.
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MingMing
ive said this again and again, just because you are infatuated with someone doesn't mean they are "the one". I've known many couples that were practically obsessed with each other. granted, they usually break up after a few months and publically cry about it online.
if you are infatuated with someone, cool! don't go post it online or something cuz 1. it is hella annoying and 2. ur making ppl who are single feel miserable. i fucking hate those couples that show off their relationship online. they don't have to rub it in my face the fact that im fucking single, even if that's not their intention. Especially given the fact that those type of relationships usually end in a few months, they have no right to do all the nonsense pda. the "happy one month, 2 month, 3 month anniversery is just BS. I get it if you are celebrating 1 year or 6 months, but celebrating month by month just shows how scared you are that they are gonna leave you and how relieved you are that your relationship lived to see another month.
You could say that I'm wrong, but unfortunately im not. I have a very close friend and his gf treats him horribly, yet because he loves her so much he decides to stay despite all the hardships. i get it, hes a lover boy, and thats not a bad thing. they've been together for 14 months, but it just shows that although on the surface it seems all good and shit, deeper down he's being treated horribly and his relationship is not going well.
so couples, unless you are out of highschool, engaged or already married, please shut the fuck up. We don't wanna hear it. Nobody wanna hear it.
check out my blog, ive covered this issue too: https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1867012
There are some points I haven’t made but that I agree with. If you publicize every cute bit of your relationship, it does mean you are afraid of losing it, or you feel it lacking.
by MZIH; ; Report
Wish I could repost this, i agree soooo so so much.
by zombizz; ; Report
s0nd3r
There are many ways that people see love. I see love in a way that catholics would see it. But yeah, I agree.
on a semi personal note I don't want to shame other teens for having a natural crush crushy type experience but sometimes the concept of having a crush weirds and creeps me out. It's okay to have a crush, but I don't think it should be something that occupies your time and where you act all yandere for them, always obsessing over them, following them around the school and stalking their social media pages.and they'll excuse it because "well he's my crush" or "i'm just a girl! hehe" no that's. you're. not supposed to do all those things to your crush that's creepy that's WEIRD you don't stalk them
i also don't like the idea of people daydreaming about their crushes about them two being in the future. to me, it's something your hormones do and you'll forget them in 20 years. i find it really unrealistic that people will view them as "the one" and plan their whole future out for them when they don't even know if they're gonna break up in the next week