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Hello , guys (*￣∇￣)ノ
So, long story short, after I moved to Germany, I met a girl and we have been friends for a few months. She's very kind, sweet and caring person , but I started to feel that she's idolizing/romanticizing me. I didn't understand that first. I thought:"Maybe it's just my low self-esteem talking. I'm just not used to people being so nice to me." But now it's clear to me that's not it.
I understand why she would do this. She drifted apart from her friend group, and I'm the only close person she can talk to. But I'm scared that one of us can get really hurt because of it. I feel like she likes spending time with me not because she likes me, but because she likes the way I make her feel. She likes the version of me , that she's created in her head.
I'm afraid she'll leave my life as quickly as she came into it. And I'm even more afraid that I might hurt her. Because I know what it's like to hold on to a friendship with someone you feel you can't breathe without. I see her excessive emotionality around me - how she rejoices at even the slightest show of physical touch from me, as if it were Christmas morning, or how she grieves if she feels even a drop of cold in my behavior, as if the end of the world has come. I don't think it's good for her mental health.
Yeah. Idk
I don't want to push her away, but I don't know how to say it to her. Do you guys been in situation like this? ( ´-｀)
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tiphareth
That's so damn rough. i for one can understand the self-destructive impulss that is attaching myself to someone/idolizing them. It's comes out of necessity, out of loneliness, and there's no easy way to break this vicious cycle.
Either you give in and become exactly what she wants from you, which is certain to be uncomfortable for you, or you slowly, but surely, show her that you're not who she thinks you are, with precise, methodical actions, and a few hard-hitting cold shoulders, which i assure you wikl hurt her, because i've been on the receiving end of such, but they may be necessary.