this stupid stick figure has consumed my life

this.

stupid.

fucking.

stickbitch.

I love him so much I legit cannot explain it

He a total fucking dork that cannot function properly without his stupid cyborg friend

And they go on stupid adventures stealing gems from museums (in which the mayor that opens them may also be aligned with him?)

He legit twirls his stupid moustache and wears a golden chain with a big stupid hat

Which he stole after possibly MURDERING THE OLD LEADER??

oh yeah

hes a terrorist btw

straight-up-in-your-face-murdering-the-masses-leader-type-terrorist

he steals from the government and is only thwarted by a time travelling psychopath?? like actual psychopath?? 

Anyways about that murdering the whole old leader 

The psychopaths jail mate assisted in the murder (which led to said jail mate to being arrested in a canadian prison) (the prison officers are all russian tho?? idk anyway)(and apparently that decanonised?? Jajsjsjsjskakbusaoxaoskx)

He’s such a pussy he didn’t even kill the old leader

and I love him so much 

anyways about that cyborg guy

they’re so gay for each other they can’t even hide it

dudes are so dedicated to each other that when cyborg man legit gets straight up RECODED to go against the TERRORIST ORGANISATION??

he flips it

and murders the psychopath mc??

bromance so solid your brain chemicals are made out of the rainbow 

and it doesn’t stop there

since reginald (oh yeah thats the guy im talking about I forgor to mention his name)

cant fight he does it all himself 

and when he gets his ass beaten by aforementioned psychopath mc he gets fixed up by this girl called fucking vinschpilsilstein, big ass mouthful but she’s hot so whatever 

its also implied she worked for the government so errrrrr

anyways if the stupid ass psychotic mc didnt fucking intervene then they could’ve gone up in a spaceship and lived happily ever after forever 

this isnt killing your gays this is killing your gays potential sigh

anyways

he has such a cunty personality 

but he puts everyone before himself?? such a good leader 

look at his stupid ass face 

scroll up

and think

.

..

…

….

…..

….

…

..

.

do you think it’s punchable? because ur so right

I wanna punch this man so hard hes so amazing i cannot believe it

i wanna eat him alive istg

anyways about that spaceship (can a man dream big?)

after he robs a bunch of people he decides to make a cool ass spaceship 

in the words of him: “far away from any meddling governments”

he has this huge ass room dedicated to like everything his terrorist organisation has stole

did you know he runs a terrorist organisation btw just saying 

in one of the endings the psychopath mc steals the spaceship and turns it into a whole ass resort hotel thing??

it’s legit just that cool and that well built

reginald copperbottom built that spaceship in a CAVE with NO MONEY and planned it with a PEN and NAPKIN and your sat here READING about SCIENCE and SAFE PROTOCOLS

hes so cute hes so pookie i want to make him explode into little worms and give him a little ecosystem within a glass jar 

I want to send him a pipebomb and give him flowers when he goes to the hospital 

i 

mansnhsdsjaoansus9shuss8wnsh

the government is legit after this man and all he does is sip his little tea and plan his fucking day out with his legs kicking behind his back all giggly 

do you think he knows what undertale is? 

anyways all the people he hires are fucking dapper

I mean his TERRORIST organisation is called the toppats

T-O-P-P-A-T not tophat, legally distinct drip 

and you know what they wear?

you’ll never guess….

…

…

top hats

crazy concept

BUT THEY WEAR THEM SO WELL 

like every single member of this TERRORIST organisation has their own cool ass hat

if there was an organisation irl that had everyone wear their own cool ass version of a top hat do you reckon world peace would be achieved 

like who is their tailor???

I legit got so into this man I made my own top hat 

yes it didnt fit why do you ask

anyways that psychopath guy 

what about him?

simple

HE STOLE THIS MANS SPOT BY THREATENING TO THROW HIM OFF A MOVING PLANE INTO THE DESERT 

little explanation

the psychopath is a very wanted criminal, remember the gem thing I mentioned with the mayor in the start? subtle foreshadowing ho he stole that. and he didn’t just steal one, no, he stole TWO. and in one of the ending? ALL THREE. WITH THE THIRD BEING STOLEN FROM THE TOPPATS. 

who knew that stealing a bunch of stuff, murdering government officials, possessing tools of mass destruction, and successfully getting away with smashing a building to bits would make you wanted? 

so the government snags this broke ass up and tells him “yeah don’t worry about the guys you’ve MURDERED and BLOWN TO SMITHEREENS, come help us take down this TERRORIST organisation even though we have no reason or purpose to trust you this much. also this is your new boyfriend charles say hi charles hes my son dont murder him”

anyways blah blah homosexuals talk business and the psychopath has reggie (reginald) in a chokehold and he promises to PASS ON the TERRORIST organisation even though the GOVERNMENT HAS HIS NAME, PRINT, HOME ADDRESS AND EVERYTHING??

anyways this psychopath 

this absolute CRETIN 

this EVIL DEVIOUS SNAKE

takes

his 

fucking

hat.

and not even just his hat. his golden motherfucking chain too.

AND HE ISNT EVEN LOYAL!!

FUCK PSYCHOPATH MAN

MY LOYALTIES LIKE IN THE 40 YEAR OLD REDDIT MOD 

GOOD DAY BITCHES THIS MAN HAS RUINED MY LIFE

ok bye

- petrichor ^_−☆