Life update

So uhh like yesterday I asked my mom during a heated argument if she would care if I died tmr and she basically said idfk rofl, like bro im ur fist born son and you say that u dgaf if I died like dawg what does ur bitch ass mean by that </33 also like tell me why parental figures are some of the biggest rage baiters like im on my tenth okay and she continues on with arguing with me like dude stfu kms and don't get me started on the fact that she calls me slurs and beats me with anything she has in her hand like sure its like a way to show that I did something wrong or whatever but its get to a point like I understand her hitting me with a charger or a book etc but when she threatens to throw fucking knives at me it makes me question her thinking. also ima loop back around to the fact that she calls me slurs for " not learning her way " like bro?? just because I have a problem learning does NOT mean you can call me slurs, also she likes to take any anger out from her boyfriend onto me like hop off dude