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It's Funny, or at least it's supposed to be. It's about two high schoolers trying to win a prize by raising the most money for their school's book club. Hope ya enjoy!
INT. CLUB MEETING ROOM - DAY 1
A group of teenagers sit around a table with a bowl of snacks in the middle, with Aden sitting across from an empty seat, sitting with one arm slumped over the back of the chair and Marcy standing next to the television. The side of the table directly in front of the television is empty. Marcy is holding the keyboard that controls the tv. The tv is displaying a slideshow that reads “Book Club: Meeting #17” Kayla walks in and sits in the seat across from Aden.
Marcy
Ahh, Kayla’s here, so that’s everyone. Good afternoon, and welcome to the seventeenth weekly meeting of this year’s Springfield High book club! As any other um, returning members might have realised, it’s about that time of year again. And for any newcomers, this time of year means that we are doing our…
The club awkwardly looks around for a few seconds in silence as Marcy struggles with the keyboard for a bit. Kayla is zoned out as hell. Marcy clicks a button on the keyboard, switching it to a second slide
Marcy
Fundraiser! so that we can pay for the next year of snacks, as well as buy books for everyone. As you already know, the school is putting pressure on our club, they think that we don’t have enough members to justify using up this room once a week and are thinking of limiting our access to this space next year. This would be a great chance to show them how much this club means to the Springfield High community!
The camera switches to a shot of Aden, then Kayla. Kayla looks disinterested, and Aden looks attentive, but not particularly “excited”. Marcy switches to another slide with a bunch of question marks on it.
Marcy
So, as my first decision as club president, I decided to up the stakes. This year, I decided to add a bit of extra incentive. Whoever raises the most money in a month will win a special prize. What could it be, a pair of headphones? A party city gift card? A brand new car? You just have to win to find out!
At the mention of a prize, Kayla’s eyes widen and her eyebrows raise. See seems to be paying more attention.
Marcy
Any method of fundraising is fair game, as long as you raise those funds. And remember, it’s not just about getting the prize, so don’t be afraid if you end up without one. The real point is to prove that our club matters, so bring in that money!! Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get to discussing the book. So last week, we discussed issue 2, when Sonichu and Chris…
During the last couple sentences, the camera cuts to a shot of Aden and Kayla staring at each other. There’s a shot of Kayla’s face as she stares intensely at aden, then a shot of aden staring back at kayla, and mouthing “that prize is mine”
EXT. STREET - DAY 2
Aden is on the street, selling cups of lemonade. The cups and pitchers of lemonade are on a table he set up, with a sign that says “ONLY $1.” Someone walks up to the stand and hands him a dollar. Aden pours the customer a cup of lemonade and hands it to them
Aden
Alright, so that’ll be one lemonade, enjoy! A refill’s only 75 cents.
Kayla walks up next to Aden holding a box of pretzels from Philly Pretzel Factory to sell them to people walking by.
Kayla
Fresh pretzels! Only $2, fresh pretzels! Hello, good afternoon, would you like a pretzel? All profits go to funding my school’s club!
Aden
Dude, what are you doing here? I’ve got this whole thing going on and you’re like messing with it!
Kayla
What, like you own the concept of selling things on the street? You wanna be alone so bad, you leave.
Aden
Fine, I see how it is. Delicious, hand-squeezed lemonade! Not store bought junk, lovingly made and sold for only $2
Kayla
What’s better than a warm pretzel on a day as cold as this? Nothing! Get your pretzels here, all profits go to ensuring access to books for children!
Aden
She’s a snake! A snake, I tell you! She’s gonna keep the money for herself! Do you really wanna support somebody like that?
Kayla
Yeah, well, do you really wanna drink lemonade with spit in it?
Kayla spits in Aden’s lemonade
Aden
You m-
Adne starts to try to smack the box of pretzels out of Kayla’s hand. She holds it out of his reach, as he keeps trying to jump up to grab it. She hugs the box, protecting it with her body as he punches the sides of it. She then starts dodging him and hopping around as he tries to grab the box or shove/trip her over. At some point during this exchange, somebody pours themselves a glass of Aden’s lemonade and walks away without paying.
FUNDRAISING MONTAGE 3
It cuts to a shot of Aden writing “+83” on a whiteboard, then it cuts to a shot of Kayla writing “+4” on a piece of paper.
It cuts to a shot of Aden breaking a piggy bank, then of him writing “+107.62” on the whiteboard.
It cuts to a shot of Kayla panhandling on the street, then of her writing “+72.65” on the paper.
It cuts to a shot of Aden hitting a vault that says “Springfield Book Club Savings” on it with a hammer, then of him writing “+162” on the whiteboard.
It cuts to a shot of Kayla shoveling snow, then of her writing “+25” on the paper.
It cuts to a shot of Aden pickpocketing someone, then of him writing “+40” then writing directly underneath it, “driver’s license" on the whiteboard.
It cuts to a show of Kayla buying a can of soda, then of her writing “-1.50” on the paper.
It cuts to a shot of Aden looking on an NFT website, then of him erasing everything on the whiteboard.
It cuts to a shot of Kayla stabbing someone in an alleyway, then of her kicking them while they lay bloody on the floor before she notices the cameraperson and charges at them, then of her writing “+5” on the piece of paper.
It cuts to a shot of Aden tutoring someone in math, then of him writing “+75” on the whiteboard.
It cuts to a shot of Kayla using tissue paper to stuff a bag with a dollar sign drawn on it, then of her writing “+8000” on the piece of paper.
The screen splits in half; one half of the screen is various shots of Kayla adding more numbers, and the other half of the screen is various shots of Aden writing more numbers.
END MONTAGE
INT. CLUB MEETING ROOM - DAY 4
All of the students from the first scene are sitting at the table (excluding Marcy, who is standing up by the tv). There are a couple of small bills and loose coins on the table, along with three large bags of money. The order the students are sitting in doesn’t matter, but Kayla and Aden must be positioned in a way where they can see each others’ faces.
Marcy
Wow, great job everybody! It seems this has been our best fundraiser yet. Looking at the sums of money you brought in, it seems that the winner of the competition is Kayla, with two bags of money, everyone: give it up for Kayla!
Kayla stands up and bows. Everybody politely claps except for Aden, who nods his head from side to side slightly and rolls his eyes.
Marcy
And our runner ups: Aden, with one bag of money, and Jaime with $3.61. Good job everyone, and congratulations to everyone. The true winners are the future students of Springfield, who will have a community of peers, a safe space to go to, a quick bite after school when there might not be anything for them to eat at home. Give a round of applause to yourselves! Alright Kayla, now for your prize:
Kayla walks up to Marcy and reaches out her hand. Marcy reaches into their pocket, before swiftly grabbing the money and attempting to run out of the building. However, before they can get very far down the hallway, they trip and drop the money. The protagonists walk up to Marcy , then look at each other, then down at Marcy, who gives them a fearful look before they look at each other again and nod. They then start beating the shit out of Marcy.
EXT. S.C. - DAY 5
Final shot is of the protagonists carrying the large bags of money whilst walking up to a strip club as the credits play over it.
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