College

College just started up again and I feel so tired already. I haven't been able to get any good nights sleep and I'm having to retake a class I already did because I failed it the first time. I remember how I failed, but this class just seems so easy to me because I already took the bulk of it.

I'm so done with myself but at leats I'm not going to make the same mistakes I did my first year. My first year, I was stuck in that highschool mindset of, "oh, this won't be that bad", but once I got into those no nonsense classes for my second semester, I realized that college is absolutely nothing like highschool, so I actually started putting work in to get myself a good grade in my classes.

I hate how everytime I start up a new school , wheather it be middle school, highschool, or college, I'm stuck in the idea that It's gonna be just like last time, and then when I'm hit with the reality of the situation, I've already fucked up enough that I'm failing. I hate myself for letting my brain do this.

Being stuck in the past and a past mindset is a problem of mine, but the future always seemed scary to me. LIke, what am I supposed to do if I don't know what's oing to happen.

ANyways, that's all I have to say. I hope you're all havinga better week than me.