intentional connection

a while ago i left a comment on a group forum talking about "being intentional with how we as a society connect [to the internet]", and i want to explain what i meant by that and how to do it.

doomscrolling is something i'm sure all of us are familiar with. getting caught in a loop of staring at our screens, looking at bad news, discourse and drama, or any sort of content that doesn't really serve a purpose.

nobody really seeks out doomscrolling, but tech companies intentionally curate these cycles to farm engagement from us.

intentional connection is the opposite. it's having full control and awareness of what we're using our time online for. because of our current society structure, it's never been harder to intentionally connect, but it's also never been more important.

this is how i would go about starting my intentional connection journey if i could start over! all of these things are completely free. i respect people who buy dumb tech to make the switch, but not all of us have the budget for that.

this is also kinda related to my last post about how i'd go about making the internet safer for kids, so i'd appreciate if you took the time to read that too :)

the number one easiest way to start is to set app time limits. it forces you to think more about what you're doing  and it keeps you from spending too long on any one thing. if you like, gradually decrease the amount of time you're given, but having a limit at all is great.

if you use social media, think about the content you consume. are you following so many accounts that you don't get to see them all? do you even pay attention to who you're following, or do you only look at the fyp or similar recommended content?

this is the important part. get comfortable with blocking people. it's not an insult, it's nothing personal, it's just curating an intentional space. here's my personal criteria:

• block influencers who are just trying to sell you stuff, whether it's products, a hyper-curated aesthetic, or even an overall lifestyle.
• block celebrities, even the ones you like.
• block anyone who makes you feel insecure.
• block anyone who only shares bad news and not any good news.
• block anyone who seems to focus on drama.
• block anyone whose content makes you feel hopeless, or otherwise promotes doomerism. "x thing is bad but there's no point in resisting!"

if you feel like there's nothing left after all of this, take a moment to consider if social media is serving you at all. there's nothing wrong with uninstalling it for a week or two, and if you don't miss it, you're probably doing yourself a favor by deleting the account.

the best way to fill in all of that extra time you'd otherwise spend scrolling is, of course, finding other hobbies. visit your local library and check out books on various topics (or use your library card and use libby and hoopla instead). try a bit of everything! there's a whole world out there.

being creative isn't about talent. it's just something humans do, and talent is subjective. even if it "sucks", take some time to draw or write now and then! it feels good to exercise your creative muscles when you stop trying to be good at it. you don't even have to share it if you don't want to.

consider doing some good in the world and spend some time volunteering! whether it's walking dogs for a shelter, protecting privacy rights, or making sandwiches for the homeless, there's good work for every cause. want to use your digital time kindly? this is a great way!

if you've been wanting to get into shape, now's the perfect time to do it! you don't have to go to the gym, you probably have enough floor space and enough heavy things right there in your house. just be careful.

dancing and singing are proven mood-boosters. once again, forget being good at it, just put on your favorite music and go for it.

you can practice critical thinking with books, shows, and movies. write your own media analysis! if you choose to share your thoughts, a lot of people like that sort of thing, and you can share ideas.

in the end, even an hour of screen time a day adds up fast. how much time have you spent on your devices? we don't live forever, so we should be mindful of what you're doing.