Beloved, I Stayed

My dear,

I have loved you more than I have ever loved myself.

I have loved you with absurd faith, with my nails dug into nothing, knowing every gesture of mine would vanish before it ever reached you.

I have given you everything my voice, my hours, my body folded into useless offerings, my blood turned into ink just to write you.

And all of it only to remain outside, watching your eyes pass over me as if I were a dead landscape.

I wanted to be what you desire, to tear off my skin and wear another, to forge myself into the shape of a man who could enter your dream.

But I am not what you seek, and I know it.

And still, I stay.

I stay, even though each day is a small funeral, even though every time you smile without thinking of me, a crack opens and I fall into it.

Hope is my executioner

a lamp that will not let me sleep,

a knife that caresses instead of striking,

so the torture lasts longer.

I love you as one loves a ghost:

embracing air,

kissing cold,

knowing there is no return,

that there will never be a return.

And still, I do not know how to live without this fire that devours me for you.

Te amo con todo mi corazon, aunque no seamos nada y tu no me quieras como yo te quiero, comprendo que aveces el amor no es suficiente. Sorry si esta mal escrito en alguna parte, no se muy bien ingles >_<