The Internet Isn't Really Fun Anymore

Blah Blah Blah, dead internet theory. This is also probably just a skill issue. 

I feel so soulless whenever I spend time on my phone/social media, that's all I do on it besides maybe scroll pinterest. I can't help but feel like the internet these days is inhuman or shallow, there's always ads in my face and every other person is competing for the most liked video or image ever. But at the same time, it's so easy. I can just turn my head off for 3-4 hours a day so I don't have to think about anything. I don't have to think about the book waiting to be read, paper waiting to be sketched on, the film camera waiting to be used. That project I've avoided working on for weeks. I've been stuck in this mental loop for years, thinking that maybe I could spend time to slow down and spend my time differently, but the 'bad' way is just so easy. All I have to do is flick my thumb, up or down. 

There's an urge or need I've been craving for the past few months, which is more or less why I made an account here, which is a more genuine internet experience. Slower paced, with real people, real thoughts, not said in a way to impress or prove something to someone else. Somewhere quiet, safe, and real. I don't really know where that is. It could be here, though a part of me is too lazy to even look (bad habits). Wherever it is, it's buried deep beneath the most well known apps or sites, influencers or video essays. 

(politics warning, skip next paragraph if you want)

I think it's natural to want to know what's going on in the world, but there's only so much negativity one can consume at once. Sure, I'll watch a million political videos in a day, I'm American so it's only natural that I feel a need to watch things be actively destroyed on a daily basis. It gets to a point where I feel guilty if I don't watch political news or videos of the sort. I know people out there are suffering and dying, they're being discriminated against, rights are being removed and stripped away, I'm surrounded by idiots, which is exactly why I feel terrible when I choose not to turn the tv on. How could I sit comfortably, eat well, drink well, bathe and sleep as much as I want, when there's people out there being blown up, starved, murdered, and raped? It's all being broadcasted online, how can someone ignore that?

It isn't fair that someone is simply able to turn off the monitor when they see something uncomfortable. Not to say that the world has been perfect up until now, but as I grow older things are not as they seem. There's no more sunshine kittens or cupcake rainbows, it was all to create a pretty picture in your head on how the world was meant to be. When I imagined being a 'grown up' as a kid, all I thought about was how many sweets I could eat without someone telling me to stop. Today, as more of a 'grown up' as I've ever been, I'm realizing that there's no point in getting a college degree if the only things I want to do, which barely hired in the first place, are being replaced by ROBOOOOTS. 

(sorry for going on a tangent I forget what I was talking about)

TLDR

Basically, I wish people were people again. And that definitely reaches out further from just talking about things you like, but the world as a whole. The internet used to be to make friends, but now it's just companies stealing from you or trying to sell you something. It's all about money, controversy and fighting, and I'm so sick of it. So maybe recommend some more sites like this one that are just genuine but also not too cringe. (just dont say tumblr or 4chan).