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Hi! I apologize for the long hiatus, I am back! I am currently taking psychology so this is about this.
I want to believe that people are a result of Humanism, but I know that is unrealistic. In context Humanism is the belief that people make their own decisions and their environment does not have an impact, and that we have complete control of our actions. Sadly nurture is a huge part of how we behave, for example from a very young age I was told that no one owes you anything, I am much less emotional and reliant on other peoples friendship for that reason. I took psychology because I didn't understand why people would make such irrational decisions, and so far it has helped. I was also raised being told that I am the only one responsible for myself, I cannot blame others for my actions. So the reason I may have such a Humanistic approach is from the way I was raised. I see so many people fall "victim" to there circumstances. I believe your circumstances are almost never an excuse, more of an explanation. For example the Menendez brothers, in the chance that they were groomed, they were both adults, they can escape that environment at that point. In my opinion you shouldn't blame your situation for your actions. When I was younger my dad told me that I can only blame them (my parents) for 6 months after I turn 18. I think that is valid since I now have autonomy over me and my body (at least as much as you can in the US right now as a woman), and the ability to educate myself. This is not to say I lack empathy, this is more of I think you should do this. I can say all of this now but I never know what I would actually do until I am in that situation. Please tell me what you think.
All love,
Annony
P.S. this was also brought on because I watched Weapon today, it has an intresting look and it's a good convo starter, please measage me if you want to talk about it :D now seriously good night
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clover - ⋆｡°✩
i think people's environment can shape how they choose to behave and what they think is the right way to handle situations. you said it yourself, your environment growing up influenced how you view relationships. in the context of people who are being abused, such as the mendez brothers, your environment affects the way you process decision making. if someone is influenced to believe how they choose to behave is correct, is that really their own fault if they are not exposed to any other beliefs?
i don't think people should be blaming their actions on other people but i do think it's ok to recognize that your environment influences how you make choices. acknowledging that the way you were raised impacts your thought processes is not blaming anyone.
the reality is though is that barely anyone will ever be able to acknowledge this. people will do what they think is right and not give it any second thought. they'll believe they are objectively correct because that's what they've been influenced to believe.
"blame" is a strong word for these things. what is someone "blaming" their decisions on their environment? is simply recognizing that your actions can be influenced by the abuse you endured in childhood blaming it on that? i don't think so. "blame" implies not taking responsibility. i'll give an example. you're in a relationship with someone. they're very nice at first, but then start to turn cold and mean. they yell at you and say hurtful things. when you ask them why, they say that in their past relationship they were cheated on. they say you're showing all the signs of a cheater. instead of talking to you about their insecurities, they try to justify themselves by blaming their ex for how they act. that's blame, not recognition. recognition would be something like, "i'm sorry i treated you that way. in my past relationship, my partner cheated on me. i feel hurt by some of the things you do and it sometimes makes me anxious you might leave me." and then you have a conversation and try to get better.
sorry if i didn't understand the post or sound rude, im not trying to i swear!1! have a nice day/night :)