i made a marvel oc!

i won't talk about them much in this blog entry though, i have other things i want to yap about.

i was talking to my friend about this oc, and they wanted to give me some of their ideas, and maybe have their oc have relations to mine. they told me something along the lines of, "but tell me if this is annoying, and i'll stop. this is supposed to be fun for you, i don't want to ruin that."

i didn't think they were being annoying, LOL, i told them that i probably won't have their oc related to mine, but they are very free to steal my oc for their own marvel universe --- what i want to focus on right now though is the fact that they described my oc making as something that was fun for me.

i never really thought it about it that way. i mean, i knew that most fandom related things, including oc making, was something that was made for fun, and i advocated for that! but i don't think it ever really clicked in my subconscious that it should be something that's fun for me too...  

i used to draw for fun, but then a year or two ago, i hit a huge artblock, and the only times i really ever drew/wrote were for when i wanted to please other people, rather than myself. i felt like all of my art needed to have some deep and complex meaning/reasoning for other people to like it. i'm not sure why having my friend say that suddenly made me realise otherwise, but, uhh, here we are?

i'm trying to teach myself to stop being so ashamed of what i like to create/consume. i started to hate drawing, but i couldn't imagine a world where i didnt create. i want to teach myself to love drawing again =).

on the topic of marvel, i feel so much like a baby in this fandom XD. all of these fanfictions that i'm reading were made years ago, same with most of the art. i don't particularly mind joining the fandom so late, i just think it's kind of funny how fresh i am to all of this XD. 

gosh... when deltarune chapters 3 and 4 came out, i was so sure that i was going to be caught up on that for the next year or two (it's already happened twice.. when chapter 1 and 2 came out),

but no, i got roped in by marvel X).

i had been obsessed with link click for over a year beforehand, which is when a lot of my artblock happened. haha, i remember when link click first came out, the small amount of people who were going insane over it, but i wasn't actually part of the fandom at that time.

i think i said this in my previous blog entry, i have a habit of only getting into media months/years after it's come out. i end up missing a lot of fandom lore because of this, it's fun to dig through the fandom trenches and re-discover everything, even if it's a bit late =)