who decided the alphabet order??

I'm tired of seeing super serious blogs. Who the hell made the alphabet order? Like did everyone just wake up one day and decide abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz was going to be the order? Why not something like tyajzowmqplfdeunxisdvbgkhrc??? I think this order is better then the one we already have. I feel like the last letters of the alphabet would have more words (like poor x there is only like xray and xylophone) if they were more upfront 😡 I feel this is disproportionately distributed to make letter like a b and c feel more important. We need to revolt to mr. English and make changes. Who is with me??? 🗣️ POWER TO THE PEOPLE FOR THE ALPHABET!!