Third day without you

July 25th, 2025

Third day... this is going by so fast. Third day without knowing anything about you. I still miss you a lot, but I'm starting to feel better. Today, for the first time, I didn’t cry, I didn’t overthink too much, and I didn’t feel too bad. I’m glad I’m going through these changes because I know it’s what you wanted. I still feel that little pain in my chest, that emptiness, but I know that with time I’ll get better, just like I promised you I would.

Today was a pretty calm day. I spent most of my time lying down in my room, but I was at peace. I didn’t talk to anyone today (besides my mom and my brother), and honestly, that makes me a little sad because I realize you were the only person I talked to daily. But well, I’ll have to get used to being alone until the vacation is over.

Speaking of that, I don’t know what I’ll do when school starts again. Seeing you probably won’t be good for me. I’m not saying I don’t want to see you—on the contrary, I’d give anything to see you for just five more minutes—but it would hurt me while also making me happy.

I hope you’re doing well, that you're managing to get through all the problems you have or may have. Even though we haven’t talked in several days, something inside me tells me that you’re okay, and I really hope that’s true. I wish I could send you a message just to ask how you’re handling everything, but I know that wouldn’t be the best for either of us.

The only thing I want is that if you ever need someone to talk to and have no one else, you can come and tell me. I’ll always be here to listen to you and help you however I can.

I feel really hurt writing all of this. Most likely, you don’t feel anything for me anymore, but I’m still fighting with all the love I have for you. But well, I guess that’s just different ways of loving, right? So here I am, writing to you every day to express myself. I wish one day you could read this, so you’d know how much I love you—or so you’d see how hurt I am, depending on how you look at it. HAHAHA.

I swear I’m going to find a way for you to see all of this someday, but for now, it’ll just be my secret.

I didn’t write as much as I did yesterday, and I think that’s a good thing (I think), but honestly, this is helping me a lot. Thank you for making me care about writing and for helping me express myself in such a beautiful way.

I love you and I miss you.

Mauri~