the (online) alternative community sucks

Dropping the typing quirks for this blog because this is something that is genuinely upsetting to me. I’ll probably end up deleting this at some point. I just really needed to express this for the time being.

I’ve been different my whole life. The “weird kid”. I won’t say I’ve been outwardly alternative my whole life, at least in terms of how I dress. But, I’ve always listened to the music I still listen to today which falls under what you’d consider alternative. (Goth, punk, emo, etc. are all under the umbrella, so I just use that word specifically.) I’ve been bullied for my interests, how I dress, how I talk, what I like to do. For a long time I stopped expressing myself because of the backlash I faced for simply existing as me.

When I finally realized I was tired of living in the box that other people had put me into, I started expressing myself again. I started dressing in the more “emo” style I’d always been attached to. I’ve been to so many local concerts and shows that it’s one of my favorite things to do now. Through this I’ve met many wonderful people. All of which are simply happy to be around people who share the same love of the music and styles they enjoy.

When I came back to the internet spaces for these things however, I noticed just how rampant elitism is. Instead of being happy to find people with similar interests, there is this culture of competition. It’s very reminiscent of early emo/scene culture. You have to be skinny, you have to wear certain clothes, your hair has to look a certain way. If you didn’t find a band when they were first making music, you don’t have a right to like them. This weird conservative mindset is what I fear has led to the death of alternative culture as a whole. (As well as capitalism and fast fashion, but that is an entirely different thing.)

I’m so tired of the word “poser” especially. In my opinion, I really don’t care if someone is a poser. I do love when people genuinely appreciate the subculture they participate in, but it honestly is none of my business what another human being does with their life. They like that song that was trending on Tik Tok? Cool, me too! I’m glad to see something I enjoy becoming something someone else enjoys. Especially if the subgenre we participate in is music based, I think it’s amazing to have more people in the community. More exposure for the bands means I get more songs and hopefully more shows!

I think the most recent and still current example of this is Pierce the Veil’s growing presence on Tik Tok. It’s because of something random trending that the band has been able to make such an epic comeback. The time between the release of Misadventures and The Jaws of Life is very long in comparison to their other releases. Because it was released after the initial downfall of emo culture, it sounded different and wasn’t very well received upon release. Personally, the album has one of my favorite PTV songs ever on it (Death of an Executioner.) It was, in my opinion, a shock to hear that they were touring for this album alone. But, I was happy to hear that, considering the band had been somewhat dormant in the years between Misadventures and TJOL. When the I Can't Hear You tour was announced, myself and other long time fans were ecstatic to hear PTV acknowledging A Flair For The Dramatic for the first time in years. Honestly, the past year has been the most I’ve heard about PTV on social media since 2016. The ICHY tour has brought so many new people to their music, and I for one have a great appreciation for that. So Far So Fake trending does ever so slightly irritate me, especially because the snippet people like is by far the most boring part of the song. But overall I’m pretty happy to see TJOL getting some love. All this is not to say that Tik Tok is the reason for PTV’s success, as they have always been one of the most well known post-hardcore “emo” bands. Nevertheless, I am glad to see them garnering more fans in this day and age.

I’ve personally experienced some of the weird elitism online lately. My old Tumblr username from 2016 was “piercetheryze”, a play on my deadname, so I made my new users “piercethevance”. Apparently, this is a lot of people’s “way of telling if someone is a poser”. I’ve had to delete my comments under other people’s videos because the replies were bashing me for a literal username. Personally I don't think anything is ever that serious. Especially because, again, it’s a variation of a username I made when I was like 11.

Something else I’ve personally experienced is the weird “fetishization” of alternative men specifically. I haven’t had my current Tik Tok account for very long, but within the week that I have, I’ve had to delete comments and even block a few people. It really isn’t hard to be a decent human being and think before you comment something weird. My videos (with the exception of maybe one of them) aren’t even close to thirst-trappy. They’re just me lip syncing to songs I like. I don’t think I’ve gotten comments like those since I posted myself in the Amino days. One of them was genuinely so vile that I had a mental breakdown, I felt so objectified.

Between these things, it’s made it hard for me to want to be a part of this community. I just want to have fun, express myself, and be weird. Without rules, without feeling gross about myself. Honestly, I’m not sure if that’s possible. I feel that these people have always been a part of this community, and always will be. There is no escaping it, I only have to learn to put up with it.

Anyways, thanks for reading my rant if you did. Feel free to share your thoughts, they’re appreciated!