Log : 200725

hello blog !

i just had my 18th birthday party yesterday! my birthday is still tomorrow tho lol :P

im not one for parties usually but i thought that this might be the only time i'll be able to do so, and so i invited a tonnnnn of people which in hindsight was a bad idea :(. everyone had fun though which made me happy.

the thing with my party was that a lot of the things i wanted to do i couldnt. there were parts of the party that were out of my control and my parents embarassed me in front of all my friends and family (and also outed that i have a bf lol). everyone took it well though and i was just an anxious ball the entire time. i felt like my family was just living through me for a bit. they changed the playlist i made entirely and made the event a whole dance party with loud trashy white girl music which they know isnt really my kind of thing, so they were fine with letting me sit it out (which i think is weird now since i thought it was supposed to be my night). at least the presence of alcohol made it seem like i wasnt sad, but only drunk lol.

im happy my friends were able to make it. i didnt really think theyd all get along but in the stress of it all i forgot that theyre all very social! it was nice seeing them get along. the best part was that i was sat next to my bf!! we held hands for a lot of the time, and i leaned on him when i started to get sleepy. i think my family noticed though, which im a little scared of. 

if i wasnt taking pictures with family and friends i was sitting down and watching everyone do their thing. its nice to know that i didnt outgrow that even at my grown age. socializing is really hard!!!

my friends gave me a ton of gifts (one of them gave me wine! how adult!!) and its all super super cute. i really love my friends. i wish that they will all live happy lives forever !!

the whole event was really overwhelming and its a bit unfortunate that i cant really have time to be alone right now to process it all :( but hey! its all gonna be okay :)

i have 2 weeks of high school left ! woah !! i want to make sure i live those 2 week very very well, even with all of the ups and downs ive had in that class. i also need to make sure i pass this physics class.

thank you for listening when i dont want anyone else to, blog <3 

see you next entry >0<!

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