loving my friends is a full time job and baby, i've never called in sick

i like to think that this page is my own little world - a home for everything in my head. and my friends are constantly on my mind and in my heart, so i thought i would make a silly little shrine to them and to platonic love in general.

songs that remind me of my friends

candleflame - adrianne lenker

true blue - boygenius

chiquitita - abba

warsh_tippy and zelda - whatever, dad

ribs - lorde

anyone else but you - the moldy peaches

hang in there - maya hawke

lovesong - beabadoobee

we're going to be friends - the white stripes

friday i'm in love - the cure

anything - adrianne lenker

sidelines - phoebe bridgers

there is a light that never goes out - the smiths

400 lux - lorde

gold and green - slaughter beach, dog

i'd like to walk around in your mind - vashti bunyan

you love me - kimya dawson

mythological beauty - big thief

bros - wolf alice

dancing queen - abba

love grows (where my rosemary grows) - edison lighthouse

we're in love - boygenius

free treasure - adrianne lenker

my beloveds <3

hadlee core

hadlee and i have been friends since kindergarten. she's just about the smartest and most multi-talented person i know. she's been there for me our whole lives and i'm so grateful to her for that. 

things that remind me of hadlee:

• baking
• swimming
• reading classics
• making friendship bracelets
• our childhood
• journalling
• claw clips and sunglasses
• cats
• lego
• plants
• realm of the elderlings (and fantasy in general)

arianna core

ari is just as chronically online as me and always matches my freak <3 she's so creative, genuine, and funny, and she's never afraid to speak out. she's also cool asf! and the most ridiculous person ever.

things that remind me of ari:

• poland
• pottery
• black cats
• fiona apple and the cranberries
• sonny angels
• rings
• pete the cat
• oil pastels
• oat milk lattes
• rock climbing
• going to the bathroom every 5 seconds

morgan core

morgan is like an angel on earth. she's so smart, gentle, and genuinely kind. and when i say angel, i mean it - she has a magic touch with animals and a love for helping others. she's ethereal!

things that remind me of morgan:

• dogs (labradoodles especially)
• flowers
• pretty nails
• crochet
• pitch perfect
• painting
• jellycat bunny
• criminal minds
• pop music
• paris
• long skirts

cleo core

cleo is sunshine incarnate and i love having conversations with her. she's hilarious, strong-willed, and driven. i could talk to her about anything and everything - especially books.

things that remind me of cleo:

• italy (she's not even italian she just has capri vibes)
• tennis
• hozier
• salad
• the pacific northwest
• mermaids
• cottagecore
• little women
• budgies
• being a hater
• lowkey dressing like a millennial mother <3

leila core

leila SUCH a real one and she deserves everything in the world. she is passionate, lovely and kind to everyone, and so intelligent (also a bit of a disaster). she joined our friend group more recently and i'm so glad she did!!

things that remind me of leila:

• coffee
• cowboys
• daschunds
• fantasy books with dragons
• navy blue
• country music
• painting
• absent-mindedly singing to herself
• pancakes
• being late
• hair braiding

poem i wrote about my friends

here is the poem: my hands burst into flowers, tulips, orange,

purple, when i see you. yellow roses and carnations, pink, white,
petals unfolding like arms from bodies, filling the emptiness.

here is the poem: my body decays into longing and the sky
gives us snow. no two flakes are the same and in every single 
one i see your skin, your wet hair curling against your back.

here is the poem: my ribs rupture with the cold air, the laughter 
we borrow from the wind. the chill is an ardent lover, 
kissing our fingertips, brushing your curls just to feel the curve of your cheek.

here is the truth: i cannot write the poem. you wrote the poem
when you hummed along from the front seat and your voice met 
me in the marrow of something ancient we don’t understand.

your mother wrote the poem in surrender, coaxing dawn’s light
from hairline fractures. like pallas from a split skull, the poem
expanded into song and the night shed all her stars for you.

the world wrote the poem in strands of dna, in karyotypes,
in evolution’s culmination in a nebula shaped like a girl,
a lyric so lovely god had to put it in a person, instead.

here is the reason: i am depleted of metaphors for you and
my tongue tires of violets and sea salt. in a dream, i write the most
beautiful plays and when i wake i find that they just say i love you.

and i do. when our past selves wrote the book of love they
forgot each other. now i am pulled apart and my organs look
like sea cliffs and estuaries. the poem works its way into our bones

and, slowly,

unwinds us.

i feel like the love i have for my friends is unbelievably rare and beautiful. a lot of people don't take platonic love seriously, but when you think about it, friends have nothing binding between them. no blood connections, no marriage contract, no physical attraction. friendship is a constant choice to be with somebody simply because you love them. 

my friends are my soulmates, my muses, and i can't picture a life without them. we were talking, the other day, about how hard it will be for us to make new friends in university. we have known each other so long that we are all part of each other. we know each other inside and out. we can say anything that comes to our mind, or hang out in silence. how do i have friends any other way?

this quote from the raven cycle sums it up pretty well: "blue was perfectly aware that it was possible to have a friendship that wasn't all-encompassing, that wasn't blinding, deafening, maddening, quickening. it was just that now that she'd had this kind, she didn't want the other."

anyway, there's my little yap about how much i love my friends. tysm for reading if you did!! this is super self-indulgent haha. just wanted to do a fun, colourful dedication to the lomls.