album review: "as i watch my life online" by late night drive home

new late night drive home album! yay! i mean, it came out a couple weeks ago but i've just now gotten around to listening to it. i got tickets to see them and ALEXSUCKS on the 20th of this month so i'm pretty excited...!!! i listened to this album at work today but my "work headphones" are super shitty and i couldn't really get the full effect + i need to listen to an album 2 or 3 times to really like... get it? if ya know ya know 

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"as i watch my life online" - 3.0/5

it's a little too repetitive but not in an annoying way. it's a great introductory track about the world of the internet right now; addiction, depression, and false information. i like the panning, (if you don't know what panning is, it's when you're listening to a song in your headphones and it goes from your left ear to your right ear or vice versa. like it's traveling through your headphones kinda. if this doesn't make sense look it up) im a huge fan of panning personally. it's an okay track. 

"she came for a sweet time" - 4.3/5

LOVE the riff here!! the lyrics in this one really speak to me. "and the wound of a guilty consciousness becomes dearest to me" devastating line. to me, this song is about a relationship where you're both unhappy but you don't want to break up because you remember how good it used to be. you're so attached to them that you can't let them go because they were the only one who was there for you. "distractions only cause reflections" is another line i just love and really relate to. it's pretty self explanatory but it's just like, the more you try to distract yourself, once you're done running away you just sit there and reflect on why you're doing this, why you can't just face it all head on. love this track, lots of substance and it makes me think a lot, i guess. 

"day 2" - 4.0/5

i feel like this track is a continuation of the last one. it feels to me like it's still about that stagnant point in the relationship. you love each other but it won't work. either way, you keep trying. "looking for love in the lust of metallic rust" feels like the relationship is just sex now. there isn't any real love anymore, but you'll try to convince yourself, or force yourself, to love them again by having sex. either way, the problems are still there. "i've always wanted you to tell them about me", is feeling ignored. they don't talk about you to their friends, or bring you up anymore. you're sort of just an afterthought now. "looking to you for something sweet" feels a lot like trying to make them care, or wanting some sort of reassurance but you're not gonna get that. solid track, good lyrical content. 

"opening a door" - 5/5

more panning, love it. actually made me cry. i found another "literally me" song. pretending you're okay and doing what you're supposed to day by day even though in your mind you just can't help but hate yourself. you know you're wasting your life by sitting alone in your room all day and wallowing in self pity. but then you get out of it, you go outside, you start seeing things differently again, you start being yourself. you start getting it together, really trying. but, of course, the second you start finally thinking things are getting better, you just fall right back into that place again. you can't make it stop, you can't control some of the things that happen; they just do. no matter how hard you try to get it together, it's just too hard. it's such a sinking and confining feeling. 

"american church" - 4.8/5 

i am an absolute sucker for grainy/muted voice effects. to me, this song is about watching your friends, or just someone close to you start to change for the worse. maybe not who they are, but just their life takes a turn you know they aren't happy with. "there's so much nothing to contemplate", them ignoring you is enough to think about. the silence, the guessing, the waiting, it just makes you wonder why, or what went so wrong. you helped them through everything when you were kids, and now they just leave you wondering why it all changed. this song could also possibly be about a sibling relationship as well. i don't see it as a romantic thing, more of a close friend or sibling kinda thing. love this track a lot. i can see it from the perspective of my own relationships and friendships with people. 

"modern entertainment" - 3.6/5

grainy voice effects... drools. i love them. i honestly don't have too much to say about this one. it has a lot less lyrical stuff i can relate too, i guess. i feel like it's maybe about the friends you have when you're young. you get high, you hang around places you aren't supposed to, that kinda stuff. and also about what we do now just to get by. instead of being truly happy you just need short dopamine hits to get by. "why would i open my eyes just to see" is a really interesting line. to me, it's kinda like, "why would i ever get up and do shit for nothing to happen? why would i try to better myself if everything is so mundane?". could also be about not wanting to face everything because it just sucks. why open your eyes when what's in front of you is all just awful shit? idk. 

"uncensored on the internet" - 3.4/5 

just about missing someone. thats it. doesn't matter who it is. you want them back. or for them to leave some sort of clue to where they've gone. you stalk their profiles, trying to see how they've been. they said they wouldn't leave you, yet there they are, running away. you try to tell them it's all okay, just come back. but they say they just need some time away. it's not just "some time"; they aren't coming back. you know how they are, how they were before they left. you just want them to come home.

"if i fall (you would crawl under my skin)"  - 3.7/5 

interesting ass title. love the horns at the end too. this is a really poetic song. kinda a crush-y song if that makes sense. you exchange glances and casual hellos. you wanna see them smile, see them happy. i don't know. to be honest i can't really seem to decipher this one 💔 just wanting to hold someone while you fall apart. wanting them to be there i guess. your self destructiveness gets in the way a lot of the time (me fr) 

"deadstar" - 2.9/5

extremely unpopular opinion but im not a fan of acoustic tracks 💔 im so sorry i just don't like them. the metaphors here are nice. it feels like a "coping with rejection song". you want to tell them you like them, but you're scared. and then you do tell them... and it doesn't work out. you kinda already knew it wasn't gonna happen but you went for it anyways. you felt like they were someone you could love, the only person you could love. some sort of infatuation, maybe? it felt a little stupid to even try, but what's done is done i guess. 

"last seen online" - 4.0/5 

reminiscing an old relationship. it's been a couple months since you last saw each other and you just can't help but wonder if anything you did really mattered to them. did you help them the way they helped you? kinda all there is to it to me at least. 

"terabyte" - 2.6/5 

literally just about having a p0rn addiction. low rating bc sex makes me uncomfortable but it's not a bad song i js don't like the content. 

"she'll sleep it off" - 2.3/5

another acoustic track bro rlly 💔 last half is super repetitive in an annoying way. this is obviously an emotional track about losing someone you love but there just isn't enough substance for me. this song just doesn't compare to the other songs in this album unfortunately. 

overall a solid album. 3.7/5. really enjoyed the first half but the second half of the album just wasn't for me i think. i definitely still love this album and think it's a great project despite some of the songs in here just not being anything that stands out. super excited to see these live! :3 

i'll probably do more music reviews soon so stay tuned for that if u care. 

love ya, bye  ☆