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ive made like 4 or 5 blogs abt her by now but I DONT CARE IM MY OWN PERSONN. anyways. im very highly queztioning myself... lemme explain (o_O)
ok so ive known her forrrr... WOAH EXACTLY A MONTH NOW. 30 DAYS. ahem staying on topic.. and shes changed me sm its genuinely unbelievable. i have MAJOR depression and ive hardly had any episodes since meeting her, when before i had multiple a day of degrading myself with things like "yoire not good enough" or "youre a bad person". well she makes me feel good enough.
thats something nobody has been able to do.
and ever since meeting her, even though we already act like a couple itz like.. i always fantasise abt ACTUALLY being a couple like doing silly thingz like sharing a drink or kissing and holding hands. but it cant be a crush or anythingz right?? bc im aroace(at least i think) and im always told stuffz like "if its a crush ull know" "if ur questioning it then it isnt" and it makes sense?? and i well... DONT know. so then its probz not a crush right. tomato me if im wrong bc i need to know ᯣ_ᯣ
shes made me so happy this past month. i feel genuinely cared about, genuinely wanted, genuinely like a PERSON. none ot those have i truly felt. i find myself doing small things that i normally wouldnt do for anybody like taking my phone in the bathroom to respond even when im showering. or freaking out when i have no wifi wondering "how am i gonna talk to her?"
but to my knowledge its all completely platonic i think?? even if the idea of just holding hands makes my heart beat a little faster. even if every little text makes my day so much better. or how everything that has two things makes me say "thats us". or how i imagine her with every love song. OH GODS I SOUND TOTALLY HEAD OVER HEELZ DONT I.
i already know the answer yall gonna give me but maybe its still something else. any advice?? (⁎⁍̴̆Ɛ⁍̴̆⁎) how do i know if its still platonic or not?? and hi ik ur reading this mystery person who i will not name unless u wanna be named.. pls disregard everything u just read bc its probably maybe not actually anything.
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♡ jovi 🐹
heheheh sounds like a crush to me
the thing about crushes is they can come and go quickly. sometimes with a friend, especially one that just seems to fit perfectly with you, theres a sort of friendship honeymoon phase where its like, "everything is perfect, im so happy, i want to spend the rest of my life with you", which can certainly feel like a crush! it's like, i've found my person!
just see where this friendship takes you! maybe you will develop actual romantic feelings, maybe not, and its okay either way! an important thing to remember is that its normal and okay to be affectionate with platonic friends, and that includes kissing and holding hands. in middle and high school me and my bffl were always hugging, holding hands in the hallway, saying we were married, all that stuff! i think i had a few different crushes on her, on and off, and tbh to this day sometimes i think about what if we had started dating, would we be actually married now? i could see it
tysmm for the advice ill def keep this in mind! ive never even crushed on someone before so i really dont know that much abt it. im forsure glad to know its normal ദ്ദി˶˃ ᵕ ˂ )✧ makes me feel a lot less weird abt the whole tjing
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