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Do I forgive my dad for abandoning me?

He left us when I was 3 and then I met him years later only for him to hit me. It's now some years since that happened and idk if I should forgive him or not. Thoughts?


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I love Teapots!

I love Teapots!'s profile picture

nuh uh


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Ka1 ☆

Ka1 ☆'s profile picture

no


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Dom

Dom's profile picture

dont talk to him


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🎧🎼TʘRI🎼🎧

🎧🎼TʘRI🎼🎧's profile picture

Nah, fuck him. He doesn't deserve your forgiveness.


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✿︎𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓪 ✿︎

✿︎𝓣𝓲𝓷𝓪 ✿︎'s profile picture

I don't think you should forgive him, you can do that if it's what you want but I dont think it is a good idea sorry for what he did to you (⁠´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`⁠;⁠)


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zerotwinklol

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Hiii :333 i don’t think that u must forgive him, but if u want, u can, but i dont think that is ok to forgive him anyways if he did that to u


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bro dile que wtf como lo vas a perdonar si te golpeaba yo opino que apliques la de kuroko chan XD :V

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Johny Hawkins

Johny Hawkins 's profile picture

Never forgive gang!


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Clem

Clem's profile picture

He does not deserve another chance at being a father or your father!! Please think about this


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𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔢

𝔏𝔦𝔩𝔢's profile picture

Noooo especially bc he hit you when you met him after a long time tf


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PippyPepperoni

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No dude...no


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lindseyy_🥀

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No, if he left you when you were only three he’s a bad dad (sorry) also if you meet him after a few years and he hits you?!? That’s messed up don’t forgive him.


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♫︎ ✯star✯ ♫︎

♫︎ ✯star✯ ♫︎'s profile picture

hey man late on this but as someone who had dealt with a similar situation, all I can reccomend is for you to go with your heart and what you feel keeps you *safe*.

Safety is a word i think many of us eventually forget when we crave that connection with somebody, especially for family.

Hell, some of us may be full of Humility, even. Being normalized to any abuse, verbal or physical. We may want to stay at the worth they see us as, or have them around as "They might be right about something in this."

My point to you, is before you think about seeing him again. Ask yourself if the time is right, look back on the things that he did and acknowledge that none of that is your fault. You were a kid looking for guidance and connection with your father. Do you really think, deep down, you can forgive him for hitting you after how long since you two last saw eachother? Or do you crave that parental attention? Once you have an answer, I'm sure the answers will come up overtime. May not be tomorrow, next week, shit even 5 months from now. But the answers will come. You just have to search, even if it's therapy.


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akin

akin's profile picture

im late but I think you shouldn't


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𝓂

𝓂's profile picture

Ik im late but do what you think is right, in my point of view you shouldn't forgive him, but if you think that he has changed MAYBE he deserves a second opportunity


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v3gar1on

v3gar1on's profile picture

There's a lot of background information here that we need. Does forgiving him mean creating a relationship with him? or does it mean just letting go of the past and not letting it hurt you further?

If it's the former, then you need to consider a lot of factors. Are you able to set boundaries with your father and be firm with it? Can you guarantee that he won't hurt you again?

The latter is easy. If it brings you peace to forgive him, then go right ahead.


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Micheal Myers

Micheal Myers's profile picture

I'm like 30 days late omg but let me say dis I may not have the EXACT same experience as u but I'm in the same boat. Do i think u should forgive him? HELL NAHH I may not know how u feel exactly BUT, Ik its difficult especially with a part of u still loving a certain part of him even if he did u dirty I get that wholeheartedly just remember time passing does not mean what he did 2 u didn't affect u in anyway. It doesn't erase those moments, those memories, and those feelings, U R NOTT obligated to forgive him even if it was years ago. Even if u want to I can't stop u from doing so cuz yk I'm just someone on da internet but if someone tells u 2 do so U DO NOT have to. I'll wrap this up by saying keep ur peace and mind. Don't ever let anybody walk over u/disrespect u in ANYWAY, ESPECIALLY a deadbeat dad u deserve 2 be happy regardless and u deserve 2 live a happy life stay safe okay ‼


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irah starr

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YEA I GUESS... every ppl deserve a chance and he's your father...


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☆kai☆

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Only forgive him if u feel like it, you should only do it if u really want to


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Seninha

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Don't let this world convince you that hate is the solution to extinguishing something you absolutely abhor because it won't. Forgiving your father is not total resolution but the first step in mending your own scars. Both of you are a part of each other and regardless of whether he hurt you and you hate him you must come to terms with the fact that you must keep your peace and comfort it. Don't allow yourself to hate because hating is succumbing to the standards of a world tainted by wickedness and deceit. Reject those principles and continue to be kind regardless what your surroundings imposes on you


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MAY DAY

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Some people say Forgiveness heals, but i Disagree.
What ever let your 'Dad' to do that won't ever justify such actions and audacity. You don't need to forgive any one as long you don't get stuck on hating him. The less space you give him in your mind the better. Some people just want forgiveness to feel better about themselves. You don't need to give that to any one.


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