He left us when I was 3 and then I met him years later only for him to hit me. It's now some years since that happened and idk if I should forgive him or not. Thoughts?
Don't let this world convince you that hate is the solution to extinguishing something you absolutely abhor because it won't. Forgiving your father is not total resolution but the first step in mending your own scars. Both of you are a part of each other and regardless of whether he hurt you and you hate him you must come to terms with the fact that you must keep your peace and comfort it. Don't allow yourself to hate because hating is succumbing to the standards of a world tainted by wickedness and deceit. Reject those principles and continue to be kind regardless what your surroundings imposes on you
Some people say Forgiveness heals, but i Disagree. What ever let your 'Dad' to do that won't ever justify such actions and audacity. You don't need to forgive any one as long you don't get stuck on hating him. The less space you give him in your mind the better. Some people just want forgiveness to feel better about themselves. You don't need to give that to any one.
I'm christian so I know my advice may feel judgemental or bad but its not - I would say forgiveness is the better option.
My father is here but not present, he's in another state with another family. And it feels weird as hell when he attempts to be a parent to me. Over the years I've been blaming myself. Trying to reach my dad when he wont reach me back. I'll never understand why he did it, but I'll never hate him. I have like a disdain toward him though, and I need to learn to forgive. For everything he did and destroyed
i know ur situation is different from mine though, my father never hit me even tho he was abusive (to my mom) I understand how hard it would be to forgive someone like that. And somehow my mom forgave him, I've never seen her happier. She's moved on and learned many life lessons from being with him.
As the saying goes, forgive but never forget. Forgiveness doesn't mean you have to be all "buddy-buddy" with the person who did you wrong.
I'm sorry this happened to you. For me, the first thing I would consider is safety, and whether choosing to be involved with this person would compromise it. If you feel unsure about this, it may be beneficial to take a step back and consider how his presence would impact you now and in the future. Even if you can see him being better or changing, think about what he's shown you now and in the past. Take care <3
I’m so sorry this happened to you. At the end of the day, it’s your choice whether you him to be involved or not, however I think it would be good to ask yourself if you would be safe around him. I can understand wanting a bond with someone, but if this person is compromising your safety and wellness, it would be a no from me. Take care <3
i don’t think that kind of thing has to or should be be forgiven. he abandoned you, and when you met him again he hurt you, that’s not something small or forgettable. you're not obligated to forgive someone just because time has passed, especially if they haven't learned a single thing or tried to make things right. you're allowed to protect yourself first, it's valid if forgiving brings you peace, but if it just feels like letting someone off the hook doing that - you don't owe him that. your safety and healing always comes first
I'm so sorry this happened to you. I went through something similar, I didn't fully forgive him for that but I've fully forgotten about him and it by finding people I can be around to make my life better. I hope everything goes well though <3
I'm so sorry this happened to you. I went through something similar, I didn't fully forgive him for that but I've fully forgotten about him and it by finding people I can be around to make my life better. I hope everything goes well though <3
That's awful, not a single how are you but a direct smack?!. I don't think you should forgive your dad but to end things matter just pray for him even tho he did you bad. :)
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irah starr
YEA I GUESS... every ppl deserve a chance and he's your father...
☆kai☆
Only forgive him if u feel like it, you should only do it if u really want to
Seninha
Don't let this world convince you that hate is the solution to extinguishing something you absolutely abhor because it won't. Forgiving your father is not total resolution but the first step in mending your own scars. Both of you are a part of each other and regardless of whether he hurt you and you hate him you must come to terms with the fact that you must keep your peace and comfort it. Don't allow yourself to hate because hating is succumbing to the standards of a world tainted by wickedness and deceit. Reject those principles and continue to be kind regardless what your surroundings imposes on you
MAY DAY
Some people say Forgiveness heals, but i Disagree.
What ever let your 'Dad' to do that won't ever justify such actions and audacity. You don't need to forgive any one as long you don't get stuck on hating him. The less space you give him in your mind the better. Some people just want forgiveness to feel better about themselves. You don't need to give that to any one.
starlord
I'm christian so I know my advice may feel judgemental or bad but its not - I would say forgiveness is the better option.
My father is here but not present, he's in another state with another family. And it feels weird as hell when he attempts to be a parent to me. Over the years I've been blaming myself. Trying to reach my dad when he wont reach me back. I'll never understand why he did it, but I'll never hate him. I have like a disdain toward him though, and I need to learn to forgive. For everything he did and destroyed
i know ur situation is different from mine though, my father never hit me even tho he was abusive (to my mom) I understand how hard it would be to forgive someone like that. And somehow my mom forgave him, I've never seen her happier. She's moved on and learned many life lessons from being with him.
As the saying goes, forgive but never forget. Forgiveness doesn't mean you have to be all "buddy-buddy" with the person who did you wrong.
by starlord; ; Report
starrysiete
I'm sorry this happened to you. For me, the first thing I would consider is safety, and whether choosing to be involved with this person would compromise it. If you feel unsure about this, it may be beneficial to take a step back and consider how his presence would impact you now and in the future. Even if you can see him being better or changing, think about what he's shown you now and in the past. Take care <3
Em \(-w-)/
DO NOT FORGIVE HIM
sadsatan
Forgiveness shouldn't mean letting down boundaries.
Vee
I think that forgiveness is earned and he should earn it, not get it since it’s been a while
𝕲𝖍𝖔𝖘𝖙
quiero un papá
Vivi
Forgiveness is a strength. It will make everything easier. Take care
starrysiete
I’m so sorry this happened to you. At the end of the day, it’s your choice whether you him to be involved or not, however I think it would be good to ask yourself if you would be safe around him. I can understand wanting a bond with someone, but if this person is compromising your safety and wellness, it would be a no from me. Take care <3
⚝ Xenny
i don’t think that kind of thing has to or should be be forgiven. he abandoned you, and when you met him again he hurt you, that’s not something small or forgettable.
you're not obligated to forgive someone just because time has passed, especially if they haven't learned a single thing or tried to make things right.
you're allowed to protect yourself first, it's valid if forgiving brings you peace, but if it just feels like letting someone off the hook doing that - you don't owe him that. your safety and healing always comes first
hna
Forgive but dont forget.
Roze
Hell no people like that don't change.
N3ON_FIREGOAT
uh no thats the type of stuff you can't forgive people about
ROFLROFLSAM
rehabbilitation
Taee
I'm so sorry this happened to you. I went through something similar, I didn't fully forgive him for that but I've fully forgotten about him and it by finding people I can be around to make my life better. I hope everything goes well though <3
Taee
I'm so sorry this happened to you. I went through something similar, I didn't fully forgive him for that but I've fully forgotten about him and it by finding people I can be around to make my life better. I hope everything goes well though <3
douwieshii
That's awful, not a single how are you but a direct smack?!. I don't think you should forgive your dad but to end things matter just pray for him even tho he did you bad. :)