Some poetry [ GROSS! lol ]

Sometimes I wonder what it is

to be a black sugar ant in a human house.

To march forward, driven by signals

not thought, not choice

toward something that gleams with promise

but ends in nothing.

To give all of your tiny self

to a goal not yours,

to a death you can’t even comprehend.

You cannot stop.

You do not stop.

The trail is all you know.

The trail is all there is.

And then

something vast and careless snuffs you out.

I cannot give them empathy.

I do not love them.

They are in my food,

in my walls,

in the quiet spaces I want left untouched.

But deeper than annoyance

I hate them for reminding me.

For being relics of a time

I would rather forget.

Hated not for what they do,

but for what they mean.

Tiny bodies

carrying echoes

of pain they did not cause

Maybe they’re just like me.

Betrayed by something too large to name,

left in a world too big,

too loud,

too cruel.

Like me

when I prayed,

and prayed,

and still no answer came.

No hand reached down.

No light broke through.

Perhaps I too am just

following a trail

marked by the lives before me

chemical, invisible,

a path that leads to

nothing.

Nothing for me.

Maybe I too

will be crushed by hands

so much larger than my body

the hands of time,

the hands of life.

And no one will look twice.