Social Media

I'm realizing how much social media affects how I think people view me or feel about me. I don't like it. How I interact on social media with people that I know in my real life makes me question what they actually think of me. When I DM someone and how or the way, they respond makes me overthink. When in reality if we were to have the same conversation in-person and respond in the same way, I wouldn't have to worry and overthink about how that person truly feels about me. In-person there is body language and face expressions to have that reassurance and social cue to understand where you stand in a conversation. But especially since on social media there's a lot that you can do to express yourself to show how you feel like, emoji's, stories, posts, likes, comments, etc. So, if I can't really tell how the person feels depending on how they respond then I overthink. I love social media for other reasons though. I just hate how I let social media depict how I view people I know in my real life feel some time of way about me. 

Even just expressing myself on social media I sometimes am hesitant. Especially if I follow people who know me in real life, I'm always hesitant to share and express myself. It's weird for me because a lot of people I know in my personal life never seen that side of me and it's because I've never let me lol. Something about posting and sharing to strangers about whatever I want and have that be their first impression of me just feels like a safe space and more comfortable than people who do know me. That is why I have two Instagram accounts. One account being just posting for family stuff or whatever and my other account just posting more of my creative expression, me, dump posting, and whatever. 

Just a rant. 

-maryl0u