Feeling uncertainty

I’m currently part of the student ambassador program at my university, and a few days ago, after finishing a campus tour, I stayed behind to chat with a few women who work in the library. I asked them whether you need a technical degree to work there, just out of curiosity, and they told me that it wasn’t strictly necessary. Then, as we kept talking, they mentioned something that really caught my attention — another institution, separate from the university, is planning to open applications this year for the LIS program (Library and Information Science).

That conversation left me thinking. Right now, I’m studying to become an English teacher — teaching English as a foreign language — and it’s something I genuinely love. I care deeply about the language, and teaching brings me a kind of joy that’s hard to describe. It feels purposeful, like I’m doing something that matters. And even though it’s not a career known for wealth or comfort, it does offer something important: stability, a steady income, and the chance to build a life doing something I believe in.

But at the same time, I’ve always dreamed of working in a library. There’s something sacred about that space — a calm, quiet world full of knowledge and stories, where everything has a place and where people come to learn, reflect, or just find a bit of peace. The thought of being part of that environment, of working there every day, really moves me. And the truth is, if I ever want to do that professionally, I’ll need to earn the LIS degree — and that would mean starting a second program at a different institution.

In a perfect world, I’d study both — I really would. But realistically, I don’t think I can manage it. My current program already demands so much of my time and energy, and I know that trying to juggle both could burn me out. I don’t want to spread myself too thin or end up doing a poor job in either one.

So I’m caught between two paths that mean a lot to me. On one side, there’s the career I’m already working toward — one that makes me happy, gives me direction, and feels secure. On the other, there’s this quiet, long-standing dream of working in a library, something that’s been in the back of my mind since I was a child. I know I still have time to think things through, but honestly, I’m already starting to feel nervous about it. I don’t want to make the wrong decision — or worse, let fear or pressure make it for me.