Burden

Lately I couldn't help but feel like I did nothing but damage myself and those around me. I keep making mistakes, losing stuff, accidentally breaking stuff, forgetting things all the time, accidentally being rude and all that. I feel lost because I have no idea how to overcome it, every time I seem to take a step forward and actually do something right it just comes crashing down moments later, for every step i take in the right direction I keep regressing 3 or 4 steps, I feel like dead weight, sometimes I just wanna disappear and be forgotten by everyone, family included, other times I just wish people flatout hated me so maybe I could get my shit straight for once and stop messing up everything I do. I've been distancing myself from everyone and I dont know how long it'll be before they give up on me. Maybe its for the better, I dont know. I'm just tired of being myself lowkey