mngbvfdhg god gimme friends

mm ngl im pretty bored rnn, it sux (tldr at end)

ppl have kinda stopped talking to me, annd with the one that isss (online) our convos are just getting shorter and shorter and imm pretty sure im the one starting it all the timeee

i dont wanna be annoying or smth but likkee i also dont wanna end contact with him so idk what to do, im letting him have a break frm me cuz i mightve been like overbearing or smth, idk

andd like its not just thatt, i can also tell that he lost interest in me, we used to alwys tease & joke w/ eachotherr but recently i feel like our friendship is one sided

also this isnt the first time this has happened or anythingg, last time this happened i stopped textinng first to not bother him, like im tryna do now, and he just never texted so i asked him abt it, i really didnt wanna seem clingy or anything but also i didnt wanna lose him (and i get that the text issss a clingy thing to do) and he said he was busy w/ smth, and it checked out so i felt bad straight away, both for overthinking andd for making him feel like he had to talk to me if that was just an excuse he made and ijdk what to do, i dont wanna lose him but i dont wanna make him stay

everyone kinda ends up getting bored of me and i just dont want him to be the same, im kinda sick of this always happening atp

i always do my best to not be too muchh, but i kinda suck at it ig??? idk, it doesnt really matter if i try or not, it always ends up the same both irl & online

w/ the amt of times this has happened im starting to think god has it out for me lol, likee its starting to make me believe in destiny (mines to be alone obv)

tldr: im lonely asf rn & might be fate or smth, kinda shitty T-T