rambling

im worried that I'm not doing enough to keep my bf like he's so amazing and he sends me all this cute stuff and he's so patient and caring and he reassures me abt stuff that normal people worry abt in a new relationship and he respects me choosing to take it slow but I haven't done anything near how he has been and I feel like im not contributing in our relationship like I'm js there and I'm not actually in it. I mean I love him I get this feeling every time he texts me I just smile and stare at my screen like a fucking idiot, I love every stupid text he sends, I love his voice, I love when he laughs but I just cant seem to say it to him. I love him but I'm scared that if I start caring too much he'll leave me like everyone else does and I don't want to lose him.