toilet troubles..

"I was relaxed sitting on the couch until I felt a feeling in my ass.it was sharp.it was painful my eyes widened in shock as I realized what it was. A piece of shit was crowning its way through my ass and I needed to act FAST luckily my bathroom is right in front of the couch, so I ran to the toilet and i sat down, grabbed a surface to hold on too and prepared for take-off but suddenly....it wasn't coming out...? I thought maybe it was just shy, and I tried to push harder but NO I gave it my all and all I got was piss...like that shit was torturing my asshole about a minute ago and NOW you want to get all shy and scared...ok I see how it is"