Todays lonesomeness

dear diary,

I've sealed myself shut today as always searching for new jobs and spacehey friends but truthfully i dont really talk to many ^^; and being in a relationship full of toxicity and abusiveness doesn't help either but thats okay!! i just hope that one day i'll heal from all this and i keep looking up with bright but distant dreams that i can make tons of cool friends even though i dont offer much but at the end of the day what can you do? i always have to be weary of her so she doesn't beat me and use me for my body, but todays i felt okay which kinda feels strange NEGL but im super duper happy, i had a good day, i played Dayz, i smoked my fave brand and i daydreamt while i read my favorite book, i listen to my favorite songs but like i said i felt suuuper duper strange cuz nothing bads happened so far and my night only just begun so imma see where the stars take me, i think im gonna draw and leave my room finally to go on a night walk and go to the store to buy my favorite gatorade!! i like to think that all of the flavors are good but maaan nothing beats a green apple flavored gatorade, like cmooon! hopefully it doesnt make me go broke cuz of my addiction to night shopping when theres not too many people, speaking of! i hope i can pick up a yummy hotdog but idk if i wanna walk that farrr, i think im gonna skate there and blast my fave sleeping with sirens songs and if im lucky, i hope my fave cashier doesnt catch me high :(( shes so nice and sweet and shes an angel and i could always go to her for advice, shes like my mom, i love her!! i wanna make myself look presentable and good to her so here goes nothing! i think thats all for today!

-Dami