saying goodbye 2 my bsf

I go to uni in the same town I'm from, so when winter and summer break come around, I stay here while most of my friends go back to their hometowns. It's such a bittersweet moment because I know I'll miss them terribly during the summer (we all live a good distance away from each other), but I remind myself I'll get to see them again once the new semester rolls around. 

Today, one of my closest friends went home for the summer. However, this time she won't be returning in the fall. We spent the last four days together as I helped her pack and clean up her apartment. It was so sad, loading up the last two years of her life into her car. She lived just down the street from me, so if we ever wanted to hang out, we were a short walk away from each other. I met her in our first year of uni, and she has genuinely been the greatest friend I've ever made. I have never felt so comfortable with someone as quickly as I did with her. She has taught me so much about friendship, connection, empathy, and being vulnerable. 

We couldn't help but cry as we said our final goodbyes. It didn't sink in until that very moment that she wouldn't be living right down the street from me anymore. In the fall, she won't come back; she'll be gone. While we hugged, my eyes watered, and I felt my chest tighten. It usually takes me a while to feel so strongly connected to someone, but for the past two years of friendship, every single moment with her felt special and intimate. I know it's not the last time we will see each other, but as we grow older and our paths continue to diverge, I know we'll have less time to catch up. She'll be in a new school and make new friends. Still, I know we'll look back on those moments we had together with fondness. I appreciated every hangout, every conversation, every laugh... I felt myself grow so much because of our friendship. I hope we can still be part of each other's lives even from a distance. 

I have had to say so many goodbyes in the last few years. Friendship and connection mean so much to me, so saying goodbye is so difficult. That's been one of the hardest parts of growing up. So. Many. Goodbyes. Though I do hope the best for anyone who's ever been part of my life. Every person holds a special place in my heart, no matter how or when things ended. 

 Today's goodbye was only temporary. I'll miss her, but I know we'll stay in touch. Our connection was strong, and I cherish it too much to let it fade just bc of the distance.