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I was diagnosed with schizophrenia at the age of 13, at the age of 16 that diagnosis changed to schizoaffective disorder, i’ve went through multiple traumatic episodes that nowadays I find humorous because of the stupid beliefs I had during them, out of this world even, but damn did they feel, sound, smell, even taste real, you know? And to this day I still struggle with them, I struggle everyday, and it’s hard to find people who actually understand, i’m not even talking about understand what it’s like to have schizophrenia, but at least understand why I don’t like certain attitudes when i’m so obviously paranoid, no i’m not acting, please stop giving me mean looks it makes me even more scared, please don’t point out or act as if what i’m hallucinating is real, joke or not, it’s not funny, and please stop trying to baby me, it won’t help, i’m an adult and I just want someone to tell me it’s not real and actually listen if they truly want to help.
I wish I had more schizophrenic friends, but I cope by just watching interviews of schizophrenic people on the internet, I just want someone who can actually share my experience with me and understand at least to an extent what it’s like.
WHO TRYNNA TRAUMA BOND WITH ME!!! (i’m joking)
Seriously tho, it sucks
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BoredStiff
I had schizophrenic episodes through practically the entire second half of last year. I remember trying to show my parents deluded and terrible things I'd written down during when I was lucid and they didn't believe me and I didn't get help until this year.
A lot of it is very hard for me to think about without tensing or tearing up. I began "hearing" and "seeing" a lot of things, thinking I was being tracked or hunted, thinking I died many years ago and then came back with something else's brain, those sorts of things. I did and said horrible things too. I wouldn't wish what happened to me to anyone else, and I am so sorry you went through this as well. We could talk more about it privately, if you want. It's hard for me to find people I can relate to.
I’m very sorry you had to go through that it sounds so so horrible and difficult to deal with, I hope you’re doing way better now, i’d love to talk in private :)
by Fer !!!; ; Report