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me yapping 2 myself while playing g00ner games.

Okay so this is a bit different on how I do my blogs but just roll with it :3. all it is is me reacting to dialogue I found funny on the games :3 (idkifthathelpsuunderstandbutifnotfuckuidc)

Game being played: Senran Kagura Estival Festival:

Narrator: *something about shinobi's and war and human calamity*

Me :3: "I'm seeing a lack of tiddies and yiddies game. false advertising chat."

---

*After learning about the backstory they force you to watch an anime clip where you learn about 2 characters. One with brown hair n pigtails. the other one is a blondie, n they visit some grave*


Me: "Where are we at..?? Why is we in the woods..?"

*the characters walk towards a unmarked grave and had flowers in their hand that I didn't fucking see.*

Me: "Thats some big ass fuck ass rock-...oh its a grave." *guilt intensifies*

Blondie: Ryobi!! Look over here! 

*she says this with her whole entire front fucking body inside a bush. Mind you. they're both wearing these small ass school uniforms so yes. her panties is out breathing allat fresh air.

Pigtails *Ryobi*: "Don't "over here me!" Do you know how you look right now?!"

Me: "Oh shit? Common sense in a video game??"

*Ryobi proceeds to slap blondies ass hard as fuck and this TIER 1 GOONER MOANED. YES. BLONDIE MOANED LOUD AS FUCK. MY FOLKS WALKED IN THE ROOM ASKING WTF WAS I DOING. SHIT PISSED ME OFF.* (we good tho) Ryobi smacked her ass like 4 more times bruh right after I'm crying. but like they see this fuckass ritual going on. yk big ass campfire and shit. and guess what blondie says.

Blondie: "oh wow!! Look at that fire!! IT WOULD FEEL SOOOOO GOOD IF I JUMPED INTO IT"

Bro I was outfreaked. bewildered. confused. astonished. fuck you mean jump in the fire. you know that shit hurts right bitch?? you dummy. dumb dumb. like I literally said dumbass. dw Ryobi smacks tf out of her tho. but apparently they see their dead sister (remember the grave??) in that fuckass ritual thing and the old grandma doing the ritual is like?? good evil idk?? so guess what this dummy does. BLONDIE SUMMONS A BLICK OUT OF NOWHERE. I MEAN THIN AIR. SHE ACTUALLY MANIFESTED THAT BITCH AND STARTED FIRING. 

*GUNSHOTS.MP4*

BLONDIE* Ryona: "DON'T TOUCH MY SISTER!!"

Me: "Bitch, how the fuck did you miss all your shots. SHES A GRANDMA. STANDING STILL FOR YOU AND YOU FUCKING MISSED??." 

then some coffin comes from the ground and closes on her sister..?? idk bro I'm as confused as yall but fuck it we ball. so they try to pry the shit open and it starts glowing. ME PERSONALLY. IM BACKING THE FUCK UP. BUT NO. THESE DUMBASSES JUST STAND THERE. ITS LIKE KISSING THEM THATS HOW CLOSE IT IS. AND THEY'RE JUST GETTING FLASHBANGED  (theyarestaringwnoproblembtw) and guess fucking what. Transported to another world. smacked the floor hard as hell.

Ryona: "Ow that really hurt!!"

Ryobi:" ..Are you alright Ryona..?"

Ryona: Yeah!, Ryobi lets do it again!, with a bang! and a woosh! and a boom! who knew this kind of pain could turn me on sooooo much!!! (bro ;-;)

Me: "THIS DUMB FUCKING BITCH WHAT?? YOU FELL FROM THE SKY!"

Ryobi: "Are you stupid?!"

Me: "Yes."

Ryona: "Don't call me stupid!! "

Ryobi:"...Then what am I supposed to call you?"

Me: : Freakbob.

Ryona: Call me a dumb bitch!! Or...what do they call a female swine..? A sow! CALL ME THAT!!"

Me: *pondering what the actual fuck I'm playing*

---

Me: *In the middle of the hack n slash gameplay*

Those game indicators/Blondie's dialogue midfight: "TAKE IT LIKE A GOOD BITCH!"

Me: "I guess this is what I signed up for..Lol" (yes I said "lol" irl)

--

*Me reading the visual novel portions which have animated characters*

Blondies booba: *Moving and swaying around like crazy*

Me: "Physics engine fighting for its life on her chest." (forcontext they were bouncing every single movement she did. no matter how small)


Ryona: Casually mentioning Ryobi wears padding on her booba

Me: "Its okay gurl. I wish I had big tiddies too."

Ryobi: *somethingaboutkillingblondieidk*

----

*Both girls doing a "Shinobi transformation sequence"*

Me:"Oh they got naked.."

Also me: "YOOO THEY HAVE THAT SHIT ON WAIT A SEC!!"

----

Me: *Watching the forced anime clip they shove down your damn throat that is impossible to skip I think*

*sister walks out the coffin revealing "she came back to life"*

*Start hearing anime theme and now suddenly both girls, including the coffin from earlier is on a beach.*

Me: "They're gonna pull some highschool musical shit and dance aren't they."

*They pull of highschool musical shit but this time everyone is in a bikini*

Me: "Okay now this. This I like. Ill watch this." (they were lowk cooking 2. they hit all them moves and it was actually really well animated for a soft ecchi game fr :sob)

Ima leave stop my yapping here for today bc my eyes hurt and I'm hungry (buymeburgerkingdm me plspslspslspsl) AND YES. I am making another one of these because its lowkey fucking fun. 

(ifyouguysgotanyvitareccomendationsTHATARENOTFUCKINGPERSONAillgladlytakethem!!)

THANKS FOR READING!! 

HAVE A GOOD DAY/NIGHT AND I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST!!

NO HASTAGS TODAY BC I DONT KNOW WHAT 2 PUT :3


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