The last summer and i feel stucked

this is my last free summer before getting to 12th grade. today is 22nd june and i still havent go anywhere=(((, i really want to go to beach or hcm smthing, but stuck at home and everyday repeat the same, the worst is i still havent figure out what to study after finished 12 grade, what kind job or what my pros and cons, i have been avoiding it, but i think that will kll me slowly or just kind of explode somehow. i dont know, i know that many years from now on, maybe i remember this blog and read my thoughts right now, i think i will feel oh yeah i been there, blah blah, just like i read those things that i wrote in the past, like how i was struggle at that moment but now looking back, everything past now, nothing stay the same.

i dont want to talk about the family stuff, its draining me literally . i feel so tired, why everybody act and say things like this.

i hope that the next time i read this, i will be fine, no problems or struggle, just feel peace and happy, and see how the old me thinking