love

there has always been this urge inside of me to discover as many things as possible and meet as many new people as i can, my life has started to feel like there is a limit and quite boring since the last few months, it's a loop of the same thing in and out. I am continuously facing issues with my girlfriend and am so mentally and physically exhausted from it, I love her so much, she means the world to me and has done so much for me, but some of these fights just drain the life out of me, endless standards and wants, never satisfied and always something I didn't do right. I wonder if I could ever make a sure decision in either staying, living happy with her forever, or giving up and finally moving on, I think I'll be on edge forever, too afraid to make a choice. There's so many things to do, I don't know how to mentally survive in such a state, it's like I'm trapped with no good way out, ugh... why am I even complaining I should be happy. or something, im a teenager why am i making things so difficult for myself