I am so done 🥰

Hey so um life can't get any worse right? 

Well my cats aka my babies went to the vet recently right?

It can't be that bad right?

Turns out one of them has kidney issues and the other I am pretty sure has UTI and either one of them has diabetes!.....

And guess what?

The vet said it's for the best that I will never see them again!

I am also pretty sure also cuz my moms like "oh no yeah I ain't dealing with all that"

So um I had a mental breakdown the day before yesterday and didn't go to school yesterday!

I feel like kms idk maybe cuz my life has already been hell and my babies have been the only thing that genuinely helped me

And of course I HAD to have that toxic relationship with my mom cuz I can't fucking tell if I hate her or not but her presence is just idk bothering away 

I mean she had a fucked up childhood herself but thx to her fuckass parenting I am the way I am fucked up! 

I feel like kms but guess what? I can't cuz of my beliefs it's a sin and I do have this connection with my beliefs ifykyk  

Not only that the other reason is I feel selfish to everyone for taking my life 

I feel like I am decomposing slowly but not enough to kill me 

Idk how I am still alive lowkey rn 

Also my coward fuckass is to scared to take my own life so if I ever say I am gonna try to kms it probably won't happend cuz of my coward fuckass but if it does don't worry about me cuz ur just gonna be griefing and yeah 

If I ever do take my life (which probably won't happen) just cry and shit but move on there's no point on crying over me I would want u to move on 

Also I am scared wtf happens after death yes I have my beliefs but I never know and that shit is a fucking hell

anyway thx for reading ts uh dw about me 

bye skibidissss