Been crying less but theres still sadness in my heart.
it hurts knowing that a few of friendships i had the pleasure of experiencing will never rekindle and i will never see them again. thats one of the costs to growth, some things are let go and cant ever be taken back. i wont deny that i can miss them as people but i dont miss the reasons why that friendship is gone. i dont miss the cracks, but instead the wallpaper i traced my finger along until we made it to that dreadful corner.
i get sick of myself when sinking in these feelings. i feel like im betraying my boyfriend but i know he would understand what i mean to convey. i dont miss the lust and tragedy, i miss remembering together about that playground in third grade or having run-on jokes with each other at school. calling just to talk about the day... but now as the days go by it hurts to remember. i feel so much for people that i thought were genuine, or people who've changed and i couldnt align to that.
its not bad to grow up, but it hurts to know whats lost/
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ocean
Sending you much love during this difficult period, it's never easy to lose a genuine connection. Trying to get out more, occupying yourself with a hobby, or surrounding yourself with friends and family may not make those feelings go away but it does make it easier, when you're around other people who are understanding i mean. But yet again the only way out is through, unfortunately we have to sit through our feelings and feel them completely for them to eventually fade. Progress isn't linear too some days grief just creeps up on you. Take it easy and don't be so hard on yourself buddy.
i really appreciate that, thank you.
by 𝔡𝔢𝔞𝔱𝔥𝔬𝔣.𝔭𝔩𝔲𝔪; ; Report