3rd letter to uou♥

My dear Art, 

   Now I find myself writing to you again. Writhing my most simple devotion to you. Caught in this endless drunken loop. But I have found that I will never regret having you in my life. Forever found haunted by your dazed face as I run my fingers in your skin.

   It truly became a shock to me. You know, I never thought of myself as someone that could charm another so easily. To find it natural to reach for your face, feel it's temperature under my finger tips. I wished to feel all the dept and lines in your skin. To feel your face to reach for the bones in your neck and slide my fingers in your hair.

   I didn't find it sensual, it felt comforting. To find comfort in comforting another, to see your state of emptiness. I found myself becing curious to see how fast I drain your mind of any thoughts. So trustful while having a blade to your skin, how could I not become obsessed? To just see that face. Closed eyes slow stabled and calmed breathing. Melting and telting your face towards my hands. 

  Is situations that I never imagine finding myself in. I never had much expectations on finding this type of trust in a person. I sencierly apologize for not showing the same towards you, my love. 

   All my harsh reject to touch comes from fear I didn't believe I had. Not towards you in the way you may have imagine. But in a shift on how your perception in me may change if I let your hands run through my hair. For you to find it tangled or not as soft as you imagined. I try to accept your hand in my face with much fear. Rejecting help, this I don't understand where it comes from. Maybe a fear of you finding me as a person that is too needy? 

   I try to feel what you feel. To accept your hands in my hair and feel emptiness but only concer comes to my head. How I yearn to find myself in that dazed empty state. You always find ways to shock me. How could you accept my touch when we are outside in the heat? To be covered in sweat and high body temperature. To accept it no worries just a small insight warning that I was already aware of. I forever need to learn from you, you are so easy to love. Worries me, what if you find yourself believing that I'm a hard person to love? 

   For ever will see you as art, with that blade in my hand all that came to my mind was how artist feel as they sculp a face in clay. There is something so intimate to sculpt a face in clay and see it start forming shape. I wish I could experience it again. 

Forever, I love you.