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SOO, I've been friends with this person for like 4 years, but I'm just really not connecting with them anymore and they make me feel really bad.
We used to be the CLOSEST and best friends, we were always together and were so similar we were basically like sisters. But since summer 2024, we've grown as people and I don't think we've been growing in the same way, so we've been growing apart. Especially since they're going more in the bad choice direction, like with drug use and such, which I do not want to be involved in since we're still young teens. We still hang out sometimes though, but I think we both bum each other out when we do. I don't know about them, but I just get so annoyed and upset during and after hanging out with them, even just texting them has that effect!! And based on the way they act before and after hanging out for a bit, I think they feel the same. We just aren't the right people for each other anymore. I've known that since after about a month of us drifting apart.
The problem is, I can't seem to let go of them. It's like I refuse to believe that we can't fix things, and that it can go back to the way it was back then, even though I want to. They're one of the two only friends I have that live near me, and I feel like that's part of why I don't want them to go, DESPITE the fact they NEVERRR want to hang out, like ever!!
Anyways, if any of you have been in this or a similar situation, what did you do about it? I really want this problem to just be in the past and I think we'd both benefit from ending this friendship :c
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Abigail
Hi!! Well, was in a similar situation I think two years ago. Been friends with this girl for like 6 years and well, I guess at the moment I wasn’t viewing how bad our friendship was going, only that the friendship was more about her than both of us y’know? But I feel you can’t let go of them because deep inside of you, you still have that little hope that things maybe could get better and plus having those memories of things y’all used to do. Just like it happened to me but, sadly we have to let them go, it may hurt for a few weeks or months but, trust me there is not other best choice but to let them go and get them off your back.
Just be honest with them, you have feel that you both aren’t in a healthy relationship (friend wise) due all reasons you may have prepared to tell her. You don’t find it healthy for yourself because 1. You mentioned she made you feel bad, right? Just be blunt and say if “Hey you make me feel this way, and I personally don’t appreciate it. This is one of the main reasons.” If she’s your friend she should have consideration for your feelings. My ex bestfriend didn’t have does, it was just a little bit and that’s it but when it happened to her I had to move the entire universe to make her feel great. It’s just unbalanced. 2. You see that she’s taking a turn in her path that doesn’t align with you, it’s okay when we grow up we tend to find other interest that maybe with this other friend won’t align with yours and well, that’s just how life is. But what I’m trying to come up is, just be honest. Honesty and with no fear, if they can’t take the heat then something is definitely off or idk I don’t know them. But think about your mental health because friendships like that destroy you mentally and it happened to me so here I am. Hope this works!
i agree
by angel 💗; ; Report
That's actually really helpful, thank you!! I'll do that and hopefully things get better for the both of us : ) Thank you a lot for the advice!!
by KAT x3; ; Report