09

I went radio silent. I'm fine, I guess, I only got busy with school, but now it's Summer [Perhaps a yay because I won't have to see those snot-nosed idiots for four months. I just don't want to be home.]

And of course, the start of this summer consists of hearing yelling and things being thrown in the room right next to me at one o'clock in the morning. My parents have been getting on my nerves more and more; just the knowledge that Mum is in the same house as me is draining every piece of energy from my body. To make it worse, she was just in my room, cuddling me in my bed because she needed comfort, even though I have a cold and just want to sleep. She saw one of my journals I had stupidly left open on my dresser. One where I document the events of my life in a fictional setting with a made-up character who is the better version of me, pathetic, I know. But the thing is that the open page had the main character mulling over his mother and the fact that she gets into his bed. Saying '[Blank] still remembers the first time mum climbed into his bed. He wishes, desperately, that he could remember what happened after.'

And that's exactly what had just happened in my room. [No sexual stuff. I wouldn't write about that, I wouldn't talk about that here, no, she has never done anything like that. She just makes me feel uncomfortable in my own skin. My skin is her skin. I cannot escape the fact I am her son.] She didn't say anything, but she was obviously reading it. I shouldn't have had the damn thing open, I know better. Now I need to make sure I take the stupid journal with me everywhere I go. I'm not risking her reading more of it. I don't think I can take that kind of torture. 

So, in other words, I'm feeling incredibly anxious. I'm already sick with a cold, dad forbids me from using any type of potion or magic in the house--and he'll be home soon--so I just feel even worse now. Why can't she just leave me alone? I can tell she's getting upset in her footsteps, so I'm going to just turn this off for now. If anyone could give some advice on how to explain the story to her in a way that will--hopefully--keep her from getting mad, I'd appreciate it.