Gay Batman Villain Scale

I think we all know Batman has one of, if not the campiest and most flamboyant cast of villains in the modern superhero era. Even at their grittiest, the sheer theatricality of his rotating lineup remains unmatched. There's just something in the Gotham City smog that makes theater kids go crazy I think. And so today I'd like to take a look at some of these villains and test them against my queer intuition to rank how gay I think they are based purely on vibes.

On a scale of 1-5, where 1 is hardly a blip and 5 is a geiger counter going off at Chernobyl, let's see how we line up.

• Joker - 4.5. He 10000% believes he's in a serious situationship with Batman. Everyone else also believes this. He was openly jealous of Catwoman when she and Bats were planning their wedding. He tried to dunk Batman in a vat of pure unfiltered love potion. He's got that full face beat. He'd get a full 5 but too many cishet dudes claim deniability and get away with it.

• TwoFace - 3.5. Some iterations are gayer than others. If you ask me, Harvey Dent is- if not bisexual- definitely an ally- but Harv plays at very different levels. Batman Forever twoface is a flamer for sure. Dark Knight twoface could be straight. In general, I'd say twoface has too much else going on to even try and determine what his deal is there. Might as well flip a coin on that one.

• Catwoman - 3.5. I want to rank her higher because she is canonically bisexual, but just as she's canonically Latina the fact is overlooked enough that most casual fans wouldn't know the difference. She gets treated too often as nothing more than a sexy prop for Bruce to moon over and anything that doesn't service that gets left in the margins. But know that I understand her truth and that truth is that she pegs Batman.

• Poison Ivy - 4.5. Ivy  is a man hating lesbian if I've ever seen one. The half point off of 5 is because she's so good at using her attributes to control men that a majority actually delude themselves into thinking they have a shot. Sure man, a shot at being turned into fertilizer maybe.

• Harley Quinn - 5. The most blatantly bi/pan character in Batman's rogues gallery. That's just a fact. She has a crises and changes her hair biweekly. She can't decide between the evil clown man and the eco-terrorist goddess. She's the manic part of manic pixie dream girl. She would laugh in your face if you told her you thought she was straight.

• Riddler - 5. In any instance that the riddler is not being portrayed as bisexual, it's because he's being written as gay. Just look at him. He's tried on multiple occasions to trick Batman into having dinner with him. He's the loudest theater kid in a city of theater kids and it's obvious he had a situationship during his college production of Othello. Even normies know he's not straight. The Harley Quinn Show has him boast about being the first openly gay rogue as if anyone would be keeping track of that.

• Sacrecrow - 1.5. He's not gay but I think he should be. There is something to be said about the Arkham games version of the character but I haven't played them so I couldn't tell you what it is.

• Penguin - 1. There are obviously some specific exceptions, but on the whole he is not gay. Confirmed ally, though occasionally only performatively. But he works in the Gotham club scene so he's at the very least tolerant.

• Mr. Freeze - 0. His love for his wife is all he has and all he is. Any feelings he may have had before he met Nora are no longer relevant and as he is now he will never feel anything again.

And with that I think we've covered most of the more recognizable villains, so I'll conclude this here as part 1, with no gaurantee of a part 2. Because this is very silly and for all I know someone's going to take it so seriously and I don't have the energy for all that. If you can be a good sport about it, feel free to let me know in the comments if you disagree with any of my assessments. And if you have any particular Batman villains you want me to rank in this potential part 2 let me know that as well! I already have a few in mind but there truly are so many.