why? (5/17/25)

I'm not going to do much formatting for this one.

Lately, things have been really stressful. (hence why i'm NOT blogging, and why the animal crossing project has completely stopped / has been cancelled, perchance) I've been freaking out a lot over exams, especially on Monday when they explained all of this to me and I nearly had a mental breakdown because they also gave me a whole assignment at the last 10 minutes of the school day, I was so fucking stressed and upset that my body stopped working at the bus loop and I collapsed into the grass. It was raining too.

And, out of nowhere, I've just been crying. Like... a lot. And I have no idea why. I don't feel at peace anymore, and it's really taking a toll on me. It doesn't even have to do with the bullying at school, that shits just boring.. Its just that everything feels wrong. Sometimes it feels like things are fading away from me, sometimes it feels like I'm a shitty person, and sometimes it feels like I'm just crying because I'm feeling extremely sympathetic around Issa, because they're having a really hard time at work. Everything just feels... wrong.

I cant stop fucking crying sometimes. Genuinely. I just feel like shit, and there's no ACTUAL good evidence for this. I've even been just hating myself more too. That's fun (/s) but it doesn't make me want to cry, I just feel disgusted with myself. 

What's going on????

Edit: it's my exams and my stupid fucking math teachers. and also someone i hate tried to come back into my life. dude, fuck everything.