The Boy I Liked In Uni-P2

IN CONCLUSION...

Men are a waste of time and energy!... I'm totally kidding

What I realized when I was off contact with him, I was actively yearning and chasing something that didn't exist in the first place! he treated me like just a passing friend while I was silently wishing on something that was completely one sided...

In truth my own Heart was my own enemy and it took me two years to notice... Had me listening to Back to December by Taylor Swift like oh my god... I had it bad.

To me we had something but to him it seemed like it probably wasn't special enough for him to want it to last.

someone who is interested in you will pursue you and they will SHOW IT. You won't have to doubt their or your feelings, weather it is platonically or romantically!!!!

If you want someone who will give you the best of who they are, be the best version of yourself to yourself!!! know you are worth so so much more! everyone is!

Plus, I heard love comes when you're not actively seeking it, I might be a hopeless romantic but who says I can't try to focus on myself more?? 

now I can finally say the songs I used to listen while I think of him, I can finally listen to them without him even being my first thought.

That all of course is easier said than it was done... around graduation whenever I heard his name or even smelled the perfume he wore on someone else, my heart would drop to my ass but by time and a LOT of help from my best friend as well as journaling and setting my mindset, I finally can say that he is forgotten, my heart doesn't drop at the mention of his name anymore. On the contrary I cringe at the mention of him mostly because of how I acted.

I saw him again last month he came to my department to deliver us some equipment, I joked about how come he doesn't use the pen I gave him (we exchanged pens back then, We bare bears themed his was a green, mine a pink so I had his green one and vice versa) he said he used it and finished the ink... I hummed then he had the nerve to tell me that he kept it... that defiantly made me choke on my spit a little but then I forgot about it until I decided to write this blog for you guys!

In short don't waste your time on a relationship or friendship that you know deep down if even just a tiny bit if you feels that the other party (Person) isn't putting in the slightest effort to keep you in their life. It is because they either don't want you or just don't care enough or feel indifferent about you. Everyone shows in one way or another that they like you and are WILLING to see you, spend time with you or text you! Etc.

NOTE: I hope you guys had fun reading my silly delusion journey, if you reached here tell me a song that's been stuck in your brain as of recent and feel free to comment what you think of today's blog!

- Em <3