Shadow milk cookie, fount of knowledge to master of deceit (analysis?) part 1

Crk sure is cooking with the beasts, so here goes another LENGTHY rant! enjoy!

PART ONE

Recently I've been wondering how exactly shadow milk flipping his virtue of knowledge to deceit happened, and the reasons behind whatever he was doing to pure vanilla. We know so little about shadow milk's past apart from him being the fount of knowledge who learned that cookies prefer sweet lies over the bitter truth, but really, what specifically drove him to be the way he is? I think him being all-knowing plays a huge part in it in the sense that, what the witches did to him was basically giving a baby all the knowledge in the world without considering how and when he would process all of it, because fully understanding what knowledge entails, what the implications are and processing it emotionally is a completely separate process. You can be a young academic with a lot of knowledge, very well capable of explaining things to students, but still be greatly detached from it emotionally and even consciously, because experience is extremely crucial to understanding what the material you're given really is in the bigger picture. No matter how knowledgeable he may have been, being given all that knowledge ever since your creation doesn't mean you will have the experience and community necessary to break it down, analyze it, make all the connections and combine different perspectives of the same information to really, really see it for what it is in its entirety. And in fact, sounds like he didn't have much of a community to discuss it with either, because as the game itself says it, the cookies averted their eyes from the truth. How can you discuss such topics with someone heavily in denial, turning a blind eye to reality and inventing a new one for the sake of comfort and happiness (I'm sure you've noticed the closed eyes motif for pure vanilla and the open eyes for shadow milk)? It's no wonder he was quite lonely indeed. Now picture such terrible isolation, knowing truths that could wreck one's entire sense of reality and self, and no one to aid in processing it, add the pressure to hide it at all costs and in turn sacrifice your integrity, and the endless sea of knowledge that has been bestowed upon you (more like dumped, to be honest) that you've yet to truly catch up with. A perfect recipe for disaster, is it not?

 The social rejection and isolation snowballs into one gigantic problem, and then once the realization of what all that knowledge entails crashes down on you with all its weight without you having had the chance to prepare and understand it at your own pace, you are bound to quite literally go insane. As for how he seemed to be fine with all he knew back then as the fount of knowledge, as I said, it probably hadn't fully caught up yet. Really, sometimes maturity and wisdom hits you quite like a train going at full speed when you're expecting it the least, years after learning whatever distresses you that you simply locked back in the depths of your subconscious. And it's a terrible thing. Not to mention, this very much illustrates the difference between being an encyclopedia and actually being wise. Wisdom REQUIRES experience. And it's best when obtained at a natural pace. Which, obviously, our dearest little jester didn't. Also, the more you know, the more you don't know. He says this if you equip his sage costume. With that in mind, you can be ready to expect the worst kind of existential and identity crises on earth, because it can SERIOUSLY mess with how you see the world due to how paradoxical everything really is and how much it loops. Your whole life will indeed feel like a lie, because essentially, we know NOTHING. Knowing everything means knowing nothing, because said everything is so subjective in its essence, we can never, never truly know how much of it is indeed true and how much of it is biased by our perceptions, feelings, and even the way we are wired to be. So it's only natural that every truth holds some amount of lies, and every lie holds some amount of truth. It depends on how you twist the angles and viewpoints, much like an abstract painting. Our existence and our perception of the world is truly is absurd.

 I have a hunch that might've been exactly what troubled shadow milk so much, so I will further elaborate on how that presents itself in shadow milk's behaviour in a part 2 of this as the wall of text might be getting a bit too long and I may or may not be taking a silly little cookie game FAR too seriously for my own good, especially since all of what I said here is really just my interpretation, a headcanon if you will, because clearly the devs haven't confirmed the specific details of what went through shadow milk's little cookie head back then as the fount of knowledge. Either way. I hope you fellow readers and especially cookie run fans found this to be insightful and not just me spewing bullshit to cope with my own experiences! I wish you a lovely day/night.

Credit to @roseraris on tumblr for cookie divider! :)

PS: part two is currently in progress, can't say when I'll be done tho. I will put a link to part 1 there and a link to part 2 here when I finish tho!