T/W: SU!CIDE MENTIONS BUT NOT CENTERED AROUND IT. JUST A QUICK RANT BEFORE I LET THIS 27TH BEER CAN KNOCK ME TO SLEEP.

05/05/25 - 2:42 AM

blog #1

    I haven't had a single proper sleep since the second week of April. Last month was a rollercoaster of so many emotions I couldn't even bring myself to feel okay after what I had been put through. I had a friend of a friend who was dear to me get called out online for being a hoe. By that I mean this girl was fcking around with dudes, like she seriously got issues with how often she chases after men. This one dude just so happened to be our ROTC Flight Leader and had a 3rd Year Criminology student for a girlfriend. They'd been together for 7 years, by the way. This fcking dude had a moment with this girl and got caught. Someone, a fourth or fifth party, maybe? Called my friend's friend out online and the school got involved, I helped the girl because she voiced out that the guy tried to force himself on her and me being the girl's girl I was did what I could to help her.

Tell me why and how this bitch somehow managed to turn the fucking tables and blamed me and my friend that the school got involved when all we did was follow orders given by our college dean. She then tries to off herself because she's "so scared" her reputation got ruined and her parents living on a different archipelago of my country might find out. So she ends up in a hospital and then gets admitted because this FCKING BITCH DRANK HALF A LITER OF ZONROX. FCKING LAUNDRY DETERGENT! AND BURNT HER WHOLE THROAT AND INTESTINES TOO! So now am feeling guilty right? Because before that, I cut her off for choosing to not listen to the teachers and getting me stressed out and nearly kicked out of my job because I had to leave for two hours and miss my shift FOR HER! NOT ONLY THAT BUT SHE DIRECTLY ALSO FAULTED ME FOR ASKING OUR COLLEGE DEAN'S HELP WITH HER SITUATION BECAUSE NONE OF US COULD CARRY IT ANYMORE. And guess what? One of our GAY classmate. and Yes it's important to remember that he's gay because this toddler man was likeable to a fault because he's gay. It's a little stereotype for the gays here where I am to be liked by everyone and have an immediate fanbase and army at their disposal when they get into fight, MEDDLED IN AND FUCKING BLAMED ME AND MY FRIEND FOR THIS CHICK'S SU!CIDE DECISION LIKE WHAT THE FUCK?!? 

I COULDN'T SLEEP FOR WEEKS! SCRATCH THAT! A WHOLE FUCKING MONTH AND WHEN I REPORTED HIM TO THE SCHOOL, GUESS WHAT THE FAG GOT?! A WARNING?! A FUCKING WARNING WHILE I GOT PULLED BEHIND MY ACADEMICS BECAUSE OF HIS INDIRECT BLAMING AND GETTING THE WHOLE BATCH TO ADMIT THEY ARE ON HIS SIDE. THIS FAGGOT GOT A WARNING AND I'M STILL STRUGGLING TO CATCH UP TO MY ACADEMICS AND MISSED ACTIVITIES. I HAVEN'T GONE TO ANY CONSULTATIONS BECAUSE THOSE WHO GAVE HIM THE WARNING WAS THE SAME WOMAN WHO HELD MY 50 PAGE BACK TO BACK PRINTED OUT PROOF, SCREENSHOTS, RECORDINGS AND EVEN VIDEOS OF ME MY FRIENDS TOOK WHEN I WAS GOING HYSTERICAL WITH A GUILT I DIDN'T DESERVE TO CARRY IN THE FIRST FUCKING PLACE.

so yeah. i'm suffering and the same toddler man is in school living his best life.