Need Advice: Should I Report Her to the Police?

Should I Report Her?

So, basically, here's what happened.

In my school cooking class, a girl in my group (I’ll call her Kat) punched me—hard enough in the arm to leave a giant bruise in the shape of her fist. She had also been bullying me for months beforehand. After the incident, the school contacted her parents, and she was given a one-day suspension.

The thing is, Kat is at an age where something like this could result in criminal charges or go on her permanent record, which is why the school asked if I wanted them to call the police. I don’t want to ruin her life—but I’m really conflicted. That’s why I’m writing this. I want to know what others think.

Some Context

In my group, there’s Kat, two boys (I’ll call them Dan and Ed), and me.

For a long time—even before the punch—Kat had been cruel to me. Dan would join in at times, and there was another girl in our group earlier in the year who was so mean she had to be removed. She had encouraged Kat and Dan to treat me poorly, and even after she was gone, they kept going.

The weird part? I was always kind to Kat. I invited her to our group, greeted her warmly, and tried to be friendly. She never liked me, and when I asked her why, she once said it was because she didn’t like the “brain rot” videos I showed. (To be fair, I never showed them to her directly—just to others in the group. But after that, I stopped entirely.)

Kat’s someone who’s often excluded by others. Many people refuse to associate with her, so I honestly thought I was doing something kind by including her. But she responded with constant bullying:

• Making fun of my appearance

• Threatening to hurt me

• Trying to burn me with scalding water

• Calling me disgusting and ugly

• Flicking water in my face

• Dumping all the work on me

• Giving me dirty looks, yelling, and ignoring me

• Swearing at me and refusing to work with me

Dan, like I said, would often back her up—especially when it came to insulting how I look. He made it very clear he didn’t want me in the group. Ed was the only kind one, but he never stood up for me. He'd just quietly comment on how unfair everything was and how awful they were treating me.

Everyone in my group witnessed how I was treated.

What Happened That Day

A few days ago, during a cooking assignment, I accidentally got some butter on my hand. Our group sometimes plays a little game where we surprise each other by smearing a tiny bit of something on their hand when they open it. I did this to Dan using the butter, and he playfully did it back—but went a bit overboard.

Kat laughed, clearly enjoying my discomfort. So I jokingly asked if she wanted to join in, holding out my greasy finger like we do in the game. She looked me dead in the eye and said, “Touch me and I’ll punch you.”

She had made threats like that before and never followed through—and honestly, she had touched me plenty of times without my consent, often aggressively. So I lightly tapped her palm.

She immediately clenched her teeth, drew her fist back, and punched me in the arm—as hard as she could—then walked away like nothing happened.

I went straight to the teacher and she sent me to the office. But at first, the staff acted like I was the problem, like I was crazy, and they were trying to make it like it was my fault, trying to act as if I had planned this or set her up, which really hurt because this was my fear going to the teachers. It wasn’t until the next day—when I woke up with a huge bruise and my mom called the school furious—that they finally took it seriously.

Eventually, the teacher realized the punch wasn’t playful. It was violent. The school admitted Kat had been bullying me and gave her a one-day suspension. They also asked whether we wanted them—or us—to call the police.

Why I’m Conflicted

I don’t want to ruin Kat’s life. She’s obviously going through things of her own. I’m not angry with her, and I’ve even forgiven her—even though she never apologized. But she’s not sorry for what she did. She’s only sorry she got caught.

And she’s violent. She really, truly hit me as hard as she could. I honestly believe she’s the kind of person who would do it again—to me or someone else. I’ve been physically abused before. I know the signs. If someone gets away with it once, it keeps happening. That’s why I had to speak up this time.

For the record, I know I shouldn’t have touched her. I own that. But I promise, my intention wasn’t malicious—it was just to include her in something playful. And she’s done way worse to me in the past without ever asking if it was okay.

So now I’m here, trying to figure out the right thing to do.

Should I Call the Police?

That’s the question I’m stuck on.

Yes, she hurt me. Yes, I believe she would do it again. And yes, she’s old enough that this is legally serious. But I don’t want her life destroyed. I just want to feel safe and not have to worry about getting hurt again.

What would you do?

Let me know in the comments and feel free to ask questions about it. I’m genuinely looking for advice here.

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Thanks for reading.