Wishing I had a gf

Man I hate being sheltered and homeschooled because I WANT A GF SO BAD and I’ll never get one because my family is Christian (I am too but I’m not homophobic or judging) and im a loser lesbian nerd,i suffer so freaking much bc I keep seeing so many pretty girls even my moots on tiktok that I talk to have gfs a and I get so jealous AAAUGGGHH not even mentioning how shy I am irl so even if a girl flirted with me I’d be WAY too scared of disappointing her and not respond which is horrible I know but I can’t help it