Creepypasta AU storytime (cringe)

Ok so storytime maybe isn't exactly accurate but I wanted to blab about this silly AU I made a few months ago that is not actually developed AT ALL... it's very bare bones but it's just for funsies and I neeeeeeddddd to tell SOMEONE about it but I'm too scared to post it on regular social media so it's going into the SpaceHey void hole x3c

The AU is called THE FUCKED UP GRIMY LAZY ADVENTURES OF JEFF, TOBY, AND BEN and it's literally just them getting kicked out of Slender-mansion bcuz they're lazy and suck at their jobs (murder)(this works if u subscribe to the idea that creepypastas are assigned "cases/tasks" by Slenderman) so they have to find somewhere to go and people to hire them as hitmen bcuz after LIVING IN THAT CUSHY ASS MANSION they don't want to sleep in the woods and not have food ig.

Now the living situation is a very easy fix, they find this big ass van and murder the guy who owns it so now they live out in a van. Not ideal but better than nothing. The issue comes with finding work. All they know is killing and obviously they look like that so it's not like they can go out and get normal jobs.... but finding people to hire them as hitmen isn't easy, and when they do they fuck it up so bad they don't even get the money 💀

At some point they're just so hungry they decide they can just steal from a store or something and brave out into the public eye praying no one notices what the fuck they look like. They get seen by this group of guys (probably college freshmen) and are questioned on why the fuck they look like that and Jeff blurts out they're in a band and are just "very committed to the look," leading to the group of guys begging them to play at a party they're throwing bcuz they can't find/afford anyone else and Jeff immediately agreeing upon hearing they'll get $50 out of it despite the fact none of them have even touched an instrument before.

I don't know how they learn abt them, but they find this band The Spits and are like "this can't be too hard they sound like shit" and literally just pretend to be them and sing their songs 😭 they have a week to practice, idfk how they get the instruments but they do, and it actually goes rly well at the party, they get the money and realize doing gigs as ""The Spits"" is way easier and more fun than trying to find work as hitmen, plus they feel like it makes them seem cooler LOL

And that's it that's the whole AU. I was ofc very inspired by The Spits, particularly "Live In A Van" and "Let Us Play Your Party", they're my fav band!!!

I also feel like I need to explain BEN in this AU. Growing up in the 2012 creepypasta fandom, BEN was always characterized as a gamer stoner-personality ladies-man older teen even if that wasn't true to the actual BEN Drowned story IN THE SLIGHTEST, but the creepypasta fandom is no stranger to mischaracterization. I think it also has to do with the creepypasta fandom at the time mostly being children and maybe not rly understanding the actual BEN Drowned story or just not even reading it, bcuz I sure as hell didn't lol. That and it's a similar situation with what happened with Eyeless Jack and his OG story. Like there was no "human before" or "origin story" for the creature in the OG pic, but he got one that the fandom basically deems his canon and ran with it. So PLEAAASSSEEE don't come at me with "Ben's 12 years old/BEN stands for Behavioral Event Network ackshually☝️" bcuz he is not either of those in this AU lol, he's just his fanon version

Anyway this AU is so fun to think abt and being cringe is very liberating, if u don't like it then u can go back to ur corner of the internet or fandom and leave me alone 🫶 Ok baiiiii!!!! <<33