𝑁𝑜𝑡 𝑢𝑠𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑖𝑡

As the oldest child, I was rarely praised by my parents, or even pitied by them.  My brother usually gets the most.  Once I was praised I felt strange and unused to it.  I actually became afraid that if I kept being praised at any time they would feel disappointed in me.  So that's why now I don't want to be praised, especially in front of many people