Ars Scribendi~ Saturday, April 19, 2025

I slept late, I had fun playing Left 4 Dead 2 with my friend. It made me appreciate the present moment... but I truly hoped I slept early. When I woke up I felt my heart sink and I can't remember what the reasons we're, but I know deep in my heart the mistakes and the things that happened that led to the way I feel during the moments I wake up. I feel so left behind and longing for the day that this sinking feeling I have to be over, I want to die. But, I just don't wanna do it... yet.

I can feel my brain turn to mush. I know I'm not alone in feeling this way... it reminds me to always be kind and I truly want to learn how to be kind to myself, even if it takes a very long time. But I know these coming days I'd feel this way...again and again. It's so agonizing. I need respite, some semblance of a life free of stress and problems, but alas. The sky had an orange hue during dusk, I felt in awe.

I also feel happy with the progress I made in this site during this day. It maybe be slow, but progress is progress~ ^^