I don't know what to do anymore

My life has been pretty bland and it's kinda suffocating me in dread and self-hatred. I have no real friends, no partner, no good relationship with anybody. My scizophrenia is also getting worse for now my visions are getting somewhat clearer everyday. I just try to get through another day and hope that it's getting better. But until then i will just use this account as a sort of diary to write everything down that is happening in my life and maybe it get's better but who knows.